Advanced puja

Hari Aum.

I got home from work today a little while ago after another day. As I work as a family physician in a government-run clinic (rather than a private one), these are fully booked every day and overflowing. People whiz in and out of my room with multiple problems ranging from simple colds and chest infections, to more serious diseases such as cancer and severe depression. I see people of all ages and stages in life, from tiny babies to middle-aged people and the very elderly.

 I enjoy my job overall though it has to be said that it is full of challenges. Not least because of the sheer number of people I see each day. And most of these people come in with tremendous stress related not only to their medical problem, but also due to the many social issues they face - including stress from divorce, financial hardship, bereavement and so on. And naturally they want to discuss the social stresses with the doctor.

I try and listen sympathetically and provide whatever medical help is possible. Some patients are pleasant and easy to work with, others are angry, rude and demanding. Some are even abusive and threatening. One meets all sorts of people in this job, and one needs to be professional at all times.

I love this job overall as I like medicine and I find people interesting. It sounds cliched but it is true. However the world is becoming more rough, and people are becoming more aggressive. So it's  not always easy being at the receiving end of people's negativity and trying to be kind and helpful in return.

I tell myself to treat this job as a great tapas. I am happy to be able to play a part in trying to make other people's life easier in some way- to be able to relieve both mental and physical pain and suffering to some extent. This is a great privilege. Yet I feel this work becomes really fulfilling for me when I do it as an offering to God.

Because ultimately that is what I want. If God accepts my work as a puja, as a tapas, and is pleased with this, then I would feel ultimate satisfaction.

I was saying to God today (which was slightly more busy and tiring than usual): "Why couldn't you make me a priest, O Lord? It would be a piece of cake, absolute bliss, for me to spend the whole day in one of Your temples, worshiping Your idols with milk and honey, offering You flowers and incense and sweets and singing some nice kirtan with fellow yogis. How pleasant this would be, how easy for me to do. How nice your idols are- for one they do not shout, they do not express anger and abuse! 

But You have given me a tapas that is much harder for me to do O God. I am being made to worship Your manifestation in human form. This is a different ball game altogether, this is a very tough type of worship indeed. Here one has to deal with people's anger and abuse, with their stress and turbulent emotions, with their pain and suffering. This is no piece of cake O Lord.

And in return for the abuse I sometimes get, You want me to show patience, sympathy, kindness and understanding. It is easy to be kind when someone is being polite. It is hard to be kind when someone is being rude and insulting. But this is what You want in the form of my Guru "Bear insult, bear injury, Highest sadhana!". This is easy to say, and so difficult to do. You are giving me ample opportunity to put this into practice via my work.

Sivananda says "Serve the poor and sick with love and affection, this is service of God". Aside from my hour or so of japa daily, I spend 6-7 hours a day in service of the poor and sick. I tell myself this is a tapas, this is my sadhana.

I am not a yogi in an Ashram doing puja and havan with idols, I am a yogi in a clinic doing puja and havan dealing with my patients.

In this clinic puja that I do daily, the patient is the idol of God, and the stethoscope, thermometer and other diagnostic medical equipment are the tools of worship. The prescription for medication that I give to the patient is the offering, and the soothing words of comfort to the stressed, weeping, depressed, unhappy people are the hymns in praise of God. Every noble and virtuous act undertaken is a flower offered at the feet of God.

This is a very difficult puja, and the only way I keep my own sanity while trying to do it well, is by repeating my mantra (Om Namo Narayanaya) regularly throughout it. There is tremendous pressure of time during these clinics as they are very busy. However I ensure that I recite my mantra 4-5 times before I call any patient into my room. This only takes a few seconds but gives me peace and strength as I feel the protecting presence of God, no matter whom I have to face. Therefore, before the patient comes in, and after the patient leaves, I ensure I recite this mantra a few times.

Also after my clinic is over, and as I drive away back home, I chant the following prayer in the car to offer the day's work to God:

Kayena vacha, manasendriyairva budhyatmanava prakriti svabhavat, karomi yadyat sakalam parasmayai, Narayanayeti samarpayami.

This means: whatever I do with my body, senses, mind, intellect, soul and entire nature, I offer as worship to Narayana.

Therefore I refuse to believe that my tapas is any less than that of a meditating yogi high up in the Himalayas worshiping God for hours daily via stone idols, milk, flowers and incense.

I tell myself again and again to motivate myself that I too do a puja of God lasting several hours per day. This puja is an advanced puja, a vishwa puja, of the type advised by my Guru Sivananda, which he too did during his time of intense sadhana (he combined japa with service of sick people as a doctor). I remind myself again and again that this sadhana can also lead me to God and to keep it up every day with zeal and determination and the right attitude.

I hope and pray that Narayana may be satisfied with this puja and that I may become fit for His darshan in this very lifetime, that I may develop parabhakti, supreme devotion, in this very lifetime.

Hari Aum Tat Sat