New year resolution: Practice more japa, Avoid preachers and preaching

Hari Aum.

My new year resolution is to practice more japa. And to reduce the amount of time spent listening to people preaching and to spend less time preaching myself. I am going to mind my own business as much as possible in terms of spiritual life. I think I have made it amply clear in this blog as to how valuable a practice japa is. Those who want to do some can, those who do not wish to need not. I am not going to recommend this anymore to anybody. This practice is known to be the easiest way to God in this Kali Yuga - this is well-known to all.

Yet I see more disciples of Swami Sivananda trying to master the headstand than doing any japa, for world peace or otherwise. Similarly a number of disciples of other saints such as Ramakrishna, Chidananda etc also appear to be very keen to only propagate their Masters' life and teachings but seem to have very little interest in practicing japa or encouraging others to do the same. I have met a number of disciples of saints whose lives was built on japa who revere their Masters but are uninterested in obeying their command to practice plenty of japa. I am tired of the company of such disciples. To each their own way I say.

I am also going to reduce the number of satsangs I attend. The reason is that, in the vast majority of cases, I do not find the speakers to be practicing even 50 % of what they preach. They also seem to lack basic kindness and compassion, and appear to be mostly stuffed with only intellectual understanding of life. I am tired of listening to dry intellectual philosophers with very little development of the heart and refuse to waste my time doing this anymore.

My best satsang is the books of my Gurus Sivananda and Chidananda. I will stick to this mainly for my spiritual inspiration. My Guru says if one cannot get any decent satsang with living persons, then satsang with books of saints is adequate.

It is a terrible waste of life to end up as a dry spiritual preacher who has never tasted the bliss of the spiritual goal, of parabhakti and jnana. I feel terrified of ending up like some of aged Swamis I have seen who have supposedly dedicated their whole lives to spiritual practice but come across as dry intellectual people lacking any compassion.
To protect myself from a similar terrible fate, I will preach less and practice more in future. My practice is not too bad, but it could be so much better. So much better. I will direct my energy henceforth in improving my own practice- in doing sadhana, in conquering my lower nature and developing virtues to the utmost extent. I feel the mantra of God is my best help in this task.

I will aim to do more japa. I want to increase my practice of this drastically in 2017. I will keep up the 11 malas a day as a minimum, but I will also select 2-4 days per month on weekends to do a more extended practice of 4-6 hours japa. I will do this on some special day in that month, for example I would like to do this extended practice on the upcoming Gita Jayanti day next Saturday.

I also want to do regular kirtan. In the midst of worldly activities in the last month or so, this has reduced. I would like to do this at least 3 times a week.

My motto for the new year is: To do japa in plenty, and keep up the medical work also as a sadhana.

I found the following article online and found this most inspiring- it is available also on the link below. This is regarding Swami Sivananda's meeting with a disciple where he exhorts him to do karma yoga along with japa.

http://sivanandadaily.blogspot.co.uk/2014_05_01_archive.html

4th November, 1949

HOW CAN I HAVE RAM’S DARSHAN? 

Sri. R.P., who has been placed in charge of the Publication League, felt a bit nervous and diffident about his capabilities. He felt that was too much of a responsible position for him to occupy with success.

As Siva entered the Office, Sri R.P. caught his eye. ‘Ohji, don’t be afraid of the work. I have written to Sri Mohindra and if he agrees we shall employ him as the Manager of the League. You can also assist him and get yourself thoroughly trained by him.

‘Don’t be afraid of work. Don’t try to run away from it. You have a sweet voice. You have nicely developed the poetic faculties. You have great devotion to the Lord also.

‘Know that the best way to attain the Lord is through work and work alone. Go and remain in a cave for twelve years without doing any work. Then come back and tell me whether you have improved or degenerated. Work here ceaselessly; and do one Mala of Japa. Find out for yourself which method helps you evolve more quickly in the spiritual path. Even if you remain in a cave for twelve years you cannot have Darshan of the Lord. But if you serve selflessly, work and work ceaselessly, and in the intervals do Japa of the Lord’s name for some time daily, the Lord will at once come to you. When selfless service has purified your heart, even before you finish the first Mala of Japa, the Lord will appear before you.

‘You do not have the vision to see what a great and soul-elevating power this service has. If only you are able to see the actual change in your heart that this service brings about, and if you are mentally able to compare this with the change that cave-dwelling will bring about, then you will at once agree with me. It is lack of this knowledge that makes you dread work. It is that which makes you feel that work is waste of time and that God can be attained only through parrot-like repetition of a Mantra.

‘Go and see the Sadhus who live an idle life. They have no care. They have no responsibility. They will pretend that they have attained a very high stage when they ought to give up work. All that they are concerned about is their daily Bhiksha. They can get up at 9 a.m. and prepared to go to the Kshetra. Come back, take the food and sleep. Wake up again for Bhiksha. That is their life. Man’s very nature is Tamasic. You have to conquer that through intense selfless service. Then Satva will supervene.

‘It is this Tamas that prompts you from within to shirk work. It is Tamas that prompts you to go away and lead an independent life. You are sure of free food from Kshetras. This free food system should be stopped altogether. It is this alone that encourages man to revel in his Tamasic indulgence.  

‘You should become a dynamic Yogi. Work alone will enable you to control your mind, to banish evil thoughts from the mind and to purify the heart. In a purified heart alone will the Lord reveal Himself. Look at me. There is 8 per cent sugar in my urine. I have so many other physical ailments. I cannot even stand for an hour at a stretch; I feel giddy. Yet, I have been working till now. You have all taken your food. But here, I am still at my work. It will take two hours for me before I can take my food.  

‘You are a good worker, no doubt. But, you feel diffident. That diffidence you can conquer only when you take intense joy in service. You should love to undertake responsible work. You wish to realise God: but can you for a moment think of God’s Great Responsibility? You are afraid of this petty work. And yet, you wish to realise Him Who bears the burden of protecting and maintaining the whole universe. You think that work will interfere with your meditation. Read the life of any saint. You will find that he has practised and preached selfless service. Everyone has worked till the very end of his life. Such should be your attitude. Then and then alone can you have Darshan of Lord Rama in a minute.’"

Hari Aum Tat Sat.

Seeking the will of God in one's daily life

Hari Aum.

I was reflecting recently on the interesting subject of the will of God. Many of us accept that if there is God, He/She also has a will. What is the meaning of the phrase "Will of God?". Broadly, this refers to the wish or desire of God. i.e. how God would want something to be. Now the yogi concept of God is one who is desireless. So how then can God have a will, or have a desire?

God is free from selfish desires. He is full and content within Himself. There is no desire for anything outside. However God in the form of Lord Krishna states that He upholds Dharma, or righteousness/goodness. That He takes an avatar when required to re-establish Dharma and eradicate the misery of Adharma or unrighteousness/badness. He also states His wish in the Gita to help jivas/individual souls wandering endlessly in samsara. In fact the whole of the Gita, is about various paths or yogas, to achieve the state of Yoga or union with the Divine which permanently ends the misery of samsara. So God has a will to help us. And He takes avatars, sends saints to give us messages on this and Himself gives teachings in the form of the Gita for this purpose.

But then it is up to us. God has given us the right to choose what we want to do. But then we have to reap the consequences of our choices. Krishna only gives advice to Arjuna after Arjuna asks Him for advice. Krishna does not force advice on Arjuna or anyone else. And even after giving His opinion on Arjuna's problem, He tells Arjuna, "You are free to accept or reject My advice as you see fit. Think well and decide your path". He does not say Oh Arjuna, I will force you to do what I want. No, He says words to the effect that "It's up to you. I can only give you advice when You want it, I can assure you of my support. I can hold out My hand to help you- if you want to reject My help, to push away My hand, that's up to you."

Krishna tells Arjuna lovingly, "I want your welfare, You are dear to me. I want what is good for you". He says words to the effect "I am this creation. I understand it better than you. I know what is good for you, more than you do. Listen to me and take my advice. Good things then will come to you. Spiritual knowledge and bliss will be yours. But if you turn away and walk the path of adharma or unrighteousness, then only suffering will come to you by the law of Karma. But the choice is yours Arjuna".

So there is a God. And He has a will. And His will includes many things beyond our tiny understanding as human beings. But one thing is clear from His words and His actions- He wants that which is good for us.

So coming out of the world of the Gita, in to our day-to-day world, we can ask ourselves "How often do I seek the will of God?".

Mostly we ask God to do our will. We say "Oh Lord, I would like You to kindly do this for me" e.g. Kindly supply me a job, a house, a spouse, a child, a this, a that.....the list never ends. My will is this O Lord, that is what we constantly say. And if He does not deliver on our request, we get angry. As Krishna says in the Gita, when desire is not fulfilled it leads to anger, and anger destroys the intelligence of the being and leads to foolish self-destructive actions. That is what our lives are mainly like.

We never say to God. Oh Lord, I woke up today thanks to Your Grace, I have another day on this mysterious planet. What is Your will for me today? What do You want me to do, to say, to think? What role do You want me to play in this creation of Yours today, O Lord? The saints say that if we seek to know the will of God for us, if we seek to live by His will, then He will guide us on a path in accordance with His will. We may not hear Him immediately replying to us "My dear Mr or Mrs So-and-so, My plan for you today is......". But we will certainly be guided from within on the path more suitable for us and this will lead to our welfare.

The saints say, in all matters seek the will of God. And stick to dharma, because adharma is always opposed to the will of God.

But what shall we do with our wills? We sometimes have such strong desires for this or that. Some have a strong desire for a particular job, a spouse, a child etc etc. We cannot just wish these away. We need a practical solution. If we could immediately surrender all our petty desires to the will of God and become entirely desireless, we would become saints at once. But this is a gradual process, not instantaneous. So what to do?

Well one practical solution would be to consult with God on all matters. Swami Chidananda, disciple of Swami Sivananda and a realised saint, was a fan of talking to God. So we could discuss with God. We could say "I am in this situation where I feel I need a job/spouse/child etc. You know best what is right for me. Please decide what should happen in my life. If this is meant to be as per Your will, then let it be so. If it is not Your will, then let it not be so. And please let me accept Your will gracefully especially when it contrasts with my own will. (as in the case of Arjuna)."

If I take my own life as an example, I can say that most of the things I asked God for which were rejected were in hindsight bad for me. In the past I have wanted a job and a relationship that would, looking back, have been an absolute disaster. At the time, when I did not get what I wanted, I was upset and disappointed. Later I realised that I got a better job and better relationship than I had asked for.

Few things in my life have gone as I planned. Many things just happened. And at the time, I could not understand why these things were happening, and sometimes they were stressful events. But in general, when I look back, I see that many good things resulted from those stressful events.

This is the strange thing about life. God gives us that which is good for us, which is often not what we want. Like a mother gives a child nutritious and healthy food, not just the junk foods that the child asks for. Sometimes to quieten a child who is loudly crying, she may give it what it wants, but in general, she always gives only that which is best for the child.

So let us form a habit of seeking the will of God. As Sivananda advises let us say "I am thine. All is thine. Thy will be done. I want nothing". With sadhana and God's grace, we will be able to say this sincerely.

It is human to be sometimes upset when our wishes are not fulfilled by God. This is our ingrained nature, to expect that our wishes will be fulfilled. But deep inside, underneath the upset feeling, let us acknowledge that whatever is happening is by the will of God and for our own good.

I will end with a quotation in a book by Swami Chidananda that I read earlier "To remember Rama (God), is the only purpose of life. All else is to fill the stomach".

Om Namo Narayanaya.

Hari Aum Tat Sat

Ramblings on gerua, Rishis and life in general

Hari Aum.

Today I feel like reflecting on my spiritual journey. I am approaching my 34th birthday in a few weeks and I feel like taking stock of where I am thus far and what I need to do.

I'm usually a relatively optimistic person. But today, I feel a tad pessimistic. I'm not thrilled about the body reaching it's 34th year. More than a third of my life is behind me. What have I achieved in spiritual life, I ask myself as I approach the coming birthday.

I feel like saying to God- You say in the form of my Guru, that life is short and time is fleeting. Make haste and attain the Goal. I could not agree more, I agree with You. I should make haste and achieve the Goal. My work as a doctor daily reminds me of the fragile nature of life. There is no knowing what will come tomorrow.

I ask God then- why don't You make me deserving. First deserve, then desire- this is what You say in the form of my Guru. Make me deserving. Make me so deserving that You will not be able to stop Yourself from granting me those spiritual goals that You Yourself have set out for me to achieve, that You want all humanity to achieve.

Neither bhakti, nor jnana, nor mukti appear to be in sight. Thirty four years have passed since I obtained this body, there is no knowing how much longer I will have it for doing sadhana. Many yogis had completed their journey by this age. I wish I had too. I know there is no point in wishful thinking, and the only thing one can do, is carry on. Carry on every day with the sadhana. But from time to time, I allow myself to express a few glum feelings.

There is also the prospect of possibly starting a family in the coming years. My medical relations enjoy reminding me that the biological clock is ticking and that if I want to have a child, I will need to think about this soon. I however have no strong desire to have a child. I am neutral on this issue. I like children a lot,  I see many of them daily as patients. However I do not expect to find happiness simply in having a child. A child is another soul, with its own desires. Raising a child will undoubtedly be a mixture of joy and sorrow. I see this all around me. It will not provide that eternal joy that I am seeking though- I know this very well. And I ask myself, will this be an obstacle in doing sadhana? How will I have time for japa, for kirtan, for sadhana, if I am running around after a child? Yet there is the other side. Having a child can be a beautiful experience. It is a privilege to be an instrument of God in giving a soul a body, a life. It could be beautiful to do japa, kirtan with a child. There is no clear answer in black and white as to whether or not one should have a child.

I therefore feel the best thing is to leave the matter in God's hands. As a duty to family, and possibly to myself, I probably will try to have a child sometime in the next couple of years. But I leave it in the hands of God as to whether or not I actually have one. My prayer is that if God feels that having a child would be good for me spiritually, and also benefit the child, then let it be so. However if this would be a serious obstacle in my spiritual life, then let this not take place. I also pray that if God decides that I should have a child, then the child should be an ardent devotee of God. I would never force spirituality on a child, but I would be deeply sorry if I had a worldly child who only thought of mundane things. I would be happy to raise a child who is deeply spiritual and desires God.

So with around of a third of my life behind me, I face decisions about the next third (assuming I live that long). The next third needs to be filled with consistent regular sadhana. I am tired of merely looking at pictures of God, of having to visualise God, of only hearing about God, and discussing with others about God. I enjoy all this of course, but it feels like it is not enough. Like every other spiritual aspirant, I want to directly experience God for myself. I want to attain the pinnacle of spiritual life in this body itself. But as my Guru says, do the sadhana, and leave the results to God. So that is what I have to do and am doing.

I look at the lives of our Rishis as an example of married couples who raised one or more children and yet had deeply spiritual lives- who attained the peak of spiritual perfection. Where has this tradition gone? Today, when one thinks of living a truly spiritual life, one automatically thinks of external sannyas. It is as though the Rishis never existed as an example of combining householder responsibilities with perfect internal sannyas and God realisation. But they did exist and are an inspiration for us.

I love the colour gerua or orange/saffron. People say it symbolises various things related to spirituality, for instance agni- the fire that destroys ignorance, it is the colour of men and women of God, who have renounced the world for God, who are on a quest for God.

This colour today has become the property of people who have taken formal external sannyas. It is their uniform. Others are not permitted to wear this colour in most Ashrams. Those who wear this colour usually are placed on a pedestal in Ashrams, and non-orange wearing people bow down and touch their feet and are expected to show them great respect (whether or not the sannyasis are really worthy of it). The orange robe has become a status symbol in the spiritual world.

But true sannyas as my Guru says, is of the mind. It involves renouncing one's pride and ego, and becoming humbler than a blade of grass (many orange-clad sannyasis on the other hand are arrogant and haughty due to their external sannyas- there is no real mental sannyas at all).  Renouncing one's relatives and job, can be easier for some of us that living with them and following my Guru's advice to "adapt, adjust, accommodate. Bear insult, bear injury".

I don't wear gerua in any Ashram because I respect their rules that only formal sannyasis can wear this. I am not keen to upset anyone in any organisation- whenever I go somewhere, I strictly obey their rules. But privately, I wear gerua in my own home when I do sadhana. I have dyed some clothes saffron and wear these when I sit for japa, kirtan or meditation. These are my sadhana clothes and I wear them only for this purpose. As I said, I love gerua. The colour is so pure, so holy, it reminds me of saints. I feel like a sannyasi when I wear these clothes. When I wear gerua, I feel like a seeker after God, like a member of that noble tribe including my Guru Sivananda, Chidananda, Malati Tapovan Mataji and countless other people who searched for and eventually found God.

Anyway. This brings my ramblings to an end for today. See link below for Sivananda's take on true sannyas- makes interesting reading.

http://sivanandaonline.org/public_html/?cmd=displaysection&section_id=560

Om Sri Gurave Namah

Hari Aum Tat Sat

Bhakti yoga: the nine ways and the five bhavas

Hari Aum.

The Gurus say that one's spiritual progress is related to one's longing for God, for Truth, for the Self- whatever one likes to call this Supreme state of consciousness.

They also say that remembrance is important. Remembering God/Truth constantly is important. When one longs for something, one cannot help but remember it.

How then to cultivate this longing? In Sanskrit, they call it mumukshutva- a burning desire for liberation, for God.

How can we long for something we feel we have never seen? Never heard? Never touched, tasted or smelt, or spoken to? How can we long for something we do not know?

Although the yogis say God is everywhere, He/She is everything we see, hear, touch, taste, smell and meet with and talk to, somehow we feel God is far away. So near and yet so far. We ask God a question, and hear no answer in our ears. It somehow doesn't feel as simple as talking to the person sitting next to one.

The Gurus say longing for God is granted by the Grace of God. Three things they say come only through the Grace of God:
1. Human birth- the human body is the vehicle that has the capacity to carry the consciousness to the level of God
2. Longing for God, to experience God-consciousness
3. Protecting care of a Guru- a God-conscious being who can guide one correctly on the path which is beset with obstacles

In developing longing for God, the concept of Bhava comes in. This is a sanskrit word which means various things- but simply put, it represents emotion, sentiment, a state of consciousness saturated with emotion.

Having the correct Bhava helps one to long for and remember God, and thus helps in the attainment of God. The Gurus say that whatever you ardently long for and desire, you will get. If you ardently desire God, then this is what you will get, so they say.

Humans are beings who have a rational/intellectual component and an emotional component. The intellectual part helps us understand the path. But the intellect cannot be used to either prove or disprove God. God cannot be grasped by the intellect.

But the yogis say, God can be felt. Feeling is therefore the key. Emotion when directed to God, says Sivananda, is called devotion.

How to develop devotion?
Sivananda reminds us of the 9 classical ways:
1. Sravana- hearing of the Lilas of God e.g. through reading a book, attending a talk, watching a TV program on this subject
2. Kirtana- singing of God's names. As we have heard and perhaps also ourselves experienced a little, the Names of God have some strange effects and power to change our consciousness.
3. Smarana- constant remembrance of God
4. Padasevana- serving the Lord's holy feet. Sivananda says this involves serving humanity as a manifestation of God, and also worship of idols that symbolise God in temples.
5.Archana- worship of God. Again this can be done through serving humanity and by worship in temples.
6. Vandana- prostration i.e. bowing down before God
7. Dasya- serving God as His/Her servant. Some people don't like the idea of being a servant. But the word servant simply means one who serves. And to serve, someone in simple terms means to work for them. It would be quite a privilege to work for God as His/Her instrument. Unlike human beings, God treats His/Her servants well- such people experience the bliss of God-consciousness.
8. Sakhya- making friends with God. Treating Him/Her as a close buddy, asking Him/Her for advice, and loving Him/Her as a close friend
9. Atma nivedana- this means surrendering one's lower self. One basically says I am not Mr or Mrs So-and-so. I am a part of God, I am one with God, my identity is with God. Not with what this world calls me and says about me.

Swami Sivananda explains the above very beautifully- see the link below:

http://sivanandaonline.org/public_html/?cmd=displaysection&section_id=496

Then we come back to the topic of bhava:

Bhavas are emotions directed to God based on a human being's experiences of love for their relations and friends. There are 5 classical ways of directing one's emotion to God.

This involves seeing God as:

1. A Master, a boss, and one is the servant. One joyfully does the work of the Lord as His/Her instrument. This is Dasya bhava.
2.  A very close friend:  One speaks to and confides freely in God. This is Sakhya bhava.
3. One's own child: One treats the Lord as one would one' own child with affection- one bathes, feeds and looks after Him/Her. This is Vatsalya bhava.
4. One's own beloved: One sees God as one's beloved. But in this there is no lust. There is only pure love and a sense of surrender of the ego - there is a feeling of oneness with the Beloved. This is Madhurya bhava.
5. God: one peacefully contemplates God, there is not much emotional excitement here, but there is still strong devotion. This is Shanta bhava.

Here is Sivananda's explanation of the five bhavas:

http://sivanandaonline.org/public_html/?cmd=displaysection&section_id=681

So, basically if one wishes to walk the path of bhakti, which is regarded as the more easy and pleasant compared to the other yoga paths by most modern Gurus (including Sivananda and Ramakrishna), then one needs to:
1. Work out what attitude one is most comfortable with in relation to God. There may be a bit of all of the five bhavas, but one may be the dominant one. One should work out which one this is.
2. One should then cultivate this bhava by practice of the nine ways of developing bhakti.

One final thing. A special place is given to kirtana in this kali-yuga. The Gurus say that the loud chanting of the Names of the Lord is the surest way to Realisation is this modern age where the minds of human beings are full of impurities and ever restless. Lord Krishna Himself says to Narada, the divine sage musician and His great devotee- "O Narada! I do not dwell in Vaikuntha, or in the hearts of the yogis, I am there where my devotee sings My Name".

See this excellent link to hear of the glories of kirtana by Sivananda :

http://sivanandaonline.org/public_html/?cmd=displaysection&section_id=443

Recently I discovered the Ramcharitmanas and read a bit of it. At the start, Tulsidas, the great poet-saint, declares the Name of God is superior to God Himself. He says the Name gives access to the God with form and without form and is therefore superior to them both. Most beautiful

See below for a link to the Ramcharitmanas in the original ancient Hindi with English translation and transliteration- this is published by a Hindu temple in America- a beautiful effort to present this marvellous work in English so that all who are interested can read it.

There is an amazing conversation at the end between a devotee in the form of a crow and Garuda, Lord Vishnu's divine vehicle. I started with this story because it caught my eye in the index due to the mention of kali yuga, the present age we live in.

http://cincinnatitemple.com/articles/Sri-Ram-Charit-Manas-Hindi-Text-Eng-Translation.pdf


Swami Chidananda (disciple of Sivananda and God-realised saint) says one's mind's power to visualise should be used in bhakti yoga. He says this is a great help. I personally find this very useful and it makes my practice more interesting. As mentioned in a previous entry, doing manasic puja helps me with my japa yoga practice. I still do this daily and find it helps reduce my mind wandering during japa and keeps my mind more on God.

I also use my power of visualisation or imagination when doing kirtan. Recently I thought it would be nice to do kirtan with a group of motivated people. My Guru says group kirtan is very effective. However it is not easy to find and meet with motivated people to do kirtan daily. As a substitute therefore, I often visualise myself in the company of three other beings who join me for kirtan. They are Ganesh, Narada and my Guru Sivananda.
I close my eyes and imagine, in the heart space (anahata chakra), the four of us sitting facing each other, with Ganesha opposite me, Narada to my left and my Guru Sivananda to my right. In the middle, there is a square area with soil where a small Tulasi plant representing the Divine Mother is growing and a Shaligram stone representing Lord Hari is present next to the Tulasi plant.

I imagine that Narada and I are a team, and Ganesha and my Guru are a team. You probably know that in kirtan, many times, people sing in a call-and-response manner. That means one person sings a line, then the other people sing the same line back to the original singer.

In this way I imagine that sometimes Narada and I start a song, then my Guru and Ganesh sing back to us, and then the other way around. Sometimes we sing in a circle- Ganesh sings the first Name of a song, then it goes anti-clockwise or clock-wise in a circle, with Narada, me and my Guru singing the next Names. We also take turns to start a song, with everyone getting a turn. (Naturally I am actually singing continuously, but I imagine that when it is their turn, their voice is dominant over mine which is not heard much).

This may sound very strange, but it really makes me enjoy my kirtan and increases my concentration. I play my simple shruti box, and I visualise Narada with his veena, I imagine my Guru with the tanpura and I picture Lord Ganesha playing the mridangam.

In this way we sing some mantras and kirtans that I have learned from some books that I have- some examples are "Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare. Hare Krishna, Hare Krisha, Krisha Krishna, Hare Hare", "Hari Bol, Hari Bol, Hari Hari Bol, Keshava, Madhava, Govinda Bol. Also "Sankara, Karunakara, Parameshwara, Jagadishwara". "Ramaya Ramabhadraya Ramachandraya Vedhase....", "Mookam karoti vachalam...yat kripa tahaham vande, Paramanandam Madhavam" "Amba, Amba, Jaya Jagadamba...."....and many more.
I cannot tell you what fun this is. I really feel they are present with me and feel blessed and elevated by having the good fortune to sing with them- kind of feel like I am their student and they are teaching me.

My husband recently joked that I am like a child who plays with imaginary friends. I politely said that there is nothing imaginary here. Imaginary and Imagination are different. Imaginary means something which is false, does not really exist. Imagination means Visualisation, using one's mental power to create a form in one's mind.
God and Guru are present everywhere- they are essence of Truth itself, there is no question of falsehood here. So naturally Ganesh, Guru and Narada are everywhere. Therefore I am not imagining them, they are really everywhere. I am only visualising with my mental power what is already there. I was glad that my husband was in agreement with with me when I said this (though he still finds my singing quartet quite amusing!).

Anyway friends, hope you also discover your bhava towards God and enjoy some of the bhakti yoga practices such as kirtan. The level of concentration one can attain though kirtan is really wonderful and worth experiencing for oneself.

Hari Aum Tat Sat

Love and God

Hari Aum.

I just finished watching a Bollywood movie called "Mohabbatein". I've seen it before but for some reason was in the mood to see it again. I invited Krishna to watch the movie with me. I imagined us both in the heartspace on a sofa with a blanket around us watching the movie. This way I try to connect my activities with God, including entertainment.
Many movies are made today that we enjoy watching - God is the maker of the movie, the special effects, the talent in the actors, the sense of humour and jokes, the seriousness and the romance.

This movie is really cheesy. I don't want to spoil it for you (in case you haven't seen it and will want to someday) but it's about love. It's about some people who are willing to sacrifice their all for the sake of their love. They are willing to sacrifice their careers, money and even their very lives for their beloved. Here the love is portrayed between human lovers, between men and women. It is sweet, impressive, charming, quite delightful. It is true and deep. Ah! one says, when watching it... Love really is the most important thing in life.

And some of this love, it is true, is demonstrated by human beings in the world around us. In their relationships with other humans- be it spouse, parents, children, whatever- a deep sacrificing patient unconditional love is there, to differing extents in different people. But where in the world do we find this love in perfection?

After the movie is over, and we switch off the television screen, and look around us, we may well ask, where is such perfect love seen in the world around us?

I would say, such love exists, it truly exists. It exists between God and His/Her lovers.

Now this sounds awfully serious. But it is not. God is not just serious. God is humour, God is play, God is laughter. Think of Lord Krishna as a child- stealing butter/clothes, breaking pots, feeding monkeys- was this serious or funny? He also had a serious side of course (taught us the Gita and all that), but heck, He had one great sense of humour.

We tend to forget that I think. When we start turning towards God, we think we have to be all serious only. No humour, no laughter. No, it is all strict discipline. Control the senses (oof), control the mind (groan), develop virtues (ouch), bear insults and injury (aarrgh). How heavy, how serious, how glum.

Is this all that God is about? Sure, we need all those things. We need discipline, sense-control, etc etc. But is that all?

I don't think so. Ultimately, as the movie says, love makes the world go around. Love is God.

The lovers of God are simply that- His/Her lovers. By lovers of God, I absolutely do not mean monks and nuns - I say this because, for some people, the phrase 'lover of God' instantly conjures up an image of someone in the ochre robe. I mean any person who really loves God, whatever their situation in life. In their hearts, they had this love for Love itself. And they practiced this love in their life. That was it.

Some lovers of God wear matted locks, some shave their heads, some have long luxurious locks, others wear top-knots, some wear a tuft of hair. Some wear tilaks, some smear ash, some wear sandal paste. Some live at home, some live in caves, some live in communities called Ashrams, some live alone, some live with people. Some call themselves single, some call themselves married, some call themselves neither. These people call themselves different things.
But these are all externalities. These are hallmarks of sampradayas and different sects. These are ultimately less important. But despite their external differences, in their hearts, these lovers of God are all the same.

What matters is simply the heart. As this movie also says. But I was reflecting, that the love portrayed in this movie between humans, is not actually seen in this world between two humans. It is seen in this real world between humans and the Divine, between humans and God.

There where God is, love is. There where the lovers of God are, love is. And the closer humans feel to God, the closer their relationships resemble the love between the lovers of God and God.

I was thinking that this movie should have been made about God and His/Her lovers (rather than between human lovers). But then I thought, if someone made a movie like that these days, they would mess it up completely. And spoil the simple love factor. Why?

Because when a movie is a made about love between God and his lover (a saint), or a book is written about a saint, it typically has this very serious format (at least in the yoga tradition). The movie or book will start by saying the saint was born on such and such auspicious day, with the moon in this nakshatra and the weather was most charming. Further, the parents were deeply pious, the child was absolutely brilliant in studies (or didn't care about studies just about God- both are seen as godly), was highly serious as a child, and started meditating in the cradle. Finally the child was non-attached i.e. did not care about family, the idea of spouse. No, God was not seen by the saint in their family or spouse- he or she simply wanted to renounce it all asap and leave for a suitable cave in the Himalayas (or other sacred spot) and close the eyes and think of God. Seeing God all around with open eyes was not an option initially in the sadhana period. Then after years of tapas in a cave or similar, the saint emerges radiant with the love of God and knowledge of God, and preaches to others the greatness of God. Ah. How impressive. How austere. How extraordinary.

But there is usually no emphasis of love in this type of a story. It is not sweet or simple. Like the movie Mohabbatein is. It creates a feeling of great superiority of the saint, he or she is far far above us on a pedestal. God is a distant and serious Being for whom one should leave one's relatives, or at least, be strict with oneself about one's love for them.

I find this really puzzling. I often think- there are 7 billion people on this planet today. There are therefore 7 billion unique ways to God.Why do religious institutions and people then forget the love factor, the most important thing, and bang on only about externalities that are relatively less important?

So many religious people have no love or compassion in them for other human beings or other living beings. They talk about God being all-loving and all-merciful, but can barely show any love and mercy to fellow human beings.

What is the meaning of their religion then? What is the point of religion that makes one argue with someone else about religion? Recently an aunt of mine who follows ISKCON (the Hare Krishna tradition) told me that my following Adi Shankara's advaita philosophy was highly "condemnable" because Sankara's concept of Samadhi is wrong according to their tradition.

I politely said that I fully respect her views, but believe that God and Samadhi is something to be experienced, not argued or talked about. I therefore suggested that when she comes to stay with me in the next few weeks (she's planning a trip to visit me), we spend some time together singing the Names of God (i.e. doing some spiritual practice that will actually get us somewhere), instead of pointlessly arguing about God. She said she wants to convert me to ISKCON philosophy. I said, I am already converted. Because I accept that all philosophies, including ISKCON, can teach us something and are right for the individual practicing that philosophy.

God has created many paths to Him/Her. But we have to work out what our unique path is. And I cannot be a part of any sect or group that criticises or looks down upon other sects or religions. I don't condemn anybody. Each to their own I say. But I personally am not comfortable with groups that claim their religion or spiritual tradition is superior. It doesn't appeal to me. In fact I find this approach has tarnished the fair name of God and religion, and is therefore the one thing that is unacceptable to me. But I have no wish to go around arguing with those who feel their philosophy is superior. To them their way, to me my way. Life is short, time is fleeting. God is to be experienced, and arguing takes us further away from Him not closer. Life is better spent doing sadhana rather than in arguing.

Anyway, the purpose of this write-up is to say that I feel God is present in ordinary things, in movies, in our relatives, in people, in the blueness of the sky, in the sunlight glinting on the leaves of trees, in the weather, in my own consciousness. And God is funny and has a sense of humour. And makes great movies. One should compliment Him/Her whenever one sees a movie one likes. Or when one enjoys anything ordinary in life. God is present in ordinary things, not just in extraordinary miracles.

After all, all is God. God is not just for monks, nuns and about grim austerity.

God is ultimately love. And as spiritual aspirants, we are trying to discover and manifest that unconditional love or God within us.

Hari Aum Tat Sat.


P.S. When I say God is love, I don't mean this in a cheesy sentimental way. Yes God is present in cheesy sentiments too, but that is not all. I mean that love which involves sacrifice for the well-being of others, which makes one extend a helping hand to someone, which helps us put ourselves in another's shoes. That love which prevents us from being judgemental or superior towards others, which involves us seeing God in others. That love that helps one to keep quiet when one is insulted, to be good to those that do us harm. That Love is God in my view. Not easy to practice, but there it is. The real article, the finest thing in life, the thing worth striving for, the goal of life.

Story of Ajamila

Hari Aum.

I wanted to share some insights gained from reading a story in the Bhagavatam- the story of Ajamila. Now this is a well-known story that I have heard and read about in the abbreviated version. Today was the first time I have read this story in the orginal, from the Bhagavatam - I read the English translation as my Sanskrit is that of a complete beginner. Nonetheless, this was the first time I read a word-for-word English translation of the Sanskrit original, and frankly, it has left me feeling rather stunned. Stunned at the extraordinary grace of God.

Let me recap the story for you. Ajamila was a decent chap, a gentleman in today's words, a brahmin of those times. He was scholarly, wise, kind, a loving husband, a caring father, a dutiful son. This was his life for a while. Then it all went horribly wrong for him. As often is the case, he fell due to his inability to control his sexual desires. (In modern times too, we are aware of people in prestigious positions who made utter fools of themselves due to their sexual urges overriding any common sense- some examples include Bill Clinton and Tiger Woods- they ruined their public image and lost respect and wealth due to sexually inappropriate behaviour).

Anyway, coming back to Ajamila- like Bill Clinton and Tiger Woods, this guy too was consumed by the fire of passion. He was married to a beautiful and noble woman- but one day he saw a promiscuous man and woman openly having sex in a forest (where he had gone to collect flowers for worship). His became obsessed and infatuated with this woman and could do nothing to get her out of his head. Finally the unfulfilled desires became too painful to bear, and he gave in. He went after her. She was happy to be with a man of some status as she was not well-off. Ajamila dumped his wife and kids and ran off with his new sexy lady. The new lady was not at all noble- she was a woman of dubious character to say the least. And Ajamila's lust had made him pretty nasty too. He began to develop new vile habits to maintain his new family- he lied, cheated, robbed people- basically became a criminal to feed his family. (Remind you of another famous Puranic character? I'm thinking of Ratnakar here- who later became Valmiki). And he had 10 kids by the age of 80- yup, no moderation in sex, and no family planning there.

Anyway, Ajamila's youngest kid was called "Narayana" and he was most fond of this little toddler. It was the custom to name one's kids after God in those days (as it still is in India). And you will soon see why this is not at all a bad idea.

One day, time was up for Ajamila. It was time to die. He was playing with the toddler Narayana, when he suddenly caught sight of some seriously unpleasant looking folks- three beings with erect hairs and holding nooses. He shrank back in fear, and was horrified to find they approached him directly and began to wrap their nooses around his soul located in the heart-space. He felt he was dying. In great fear and terror, he yelled out to his son "Narayana!!!!!!"

A few moments after he yelled "Narayana", he found himself surrounded by four dazzling beings of handsome appearance. They were dressed like Vishnu and looked like Vishnu- in that, they were a dark colour like a raincloud, wore yellow silks, and had four celestial arms in which they held a conch, discus, mace and play lotus.

They immediately freed Ajamila from the nooses. He remained there trembling and went on to witness an extraordinary debate between the two parties.

The fierce beings with the nooses were the servants of the god of Death (Yama) and were called the Yama-dootas (messengers of Death). They were pretty annoyed. Never before had anyone stopped them from doing their duty. They asked the dazzling beings who they were and what the heck was going on. This Ajamila was a sinner they said, and it was their business to take him off to some nasty places where he would pay for the sins committed on this planet. He had committed sins and not done any penance to expiate the sins they said. It was time for him to suffer that which he had inflicted on others- this was the inexorable law of karma and nothing and nobody could stand in its way.

The dazzling beings, who were the servants or messengers of Vishnu, Vishnu-dootas, smiled at the confusion of the Yama-dootas. They stated that Ajamila was in fact no longer a sinner as he had wiped out every one of his hundreds of sins by the mere utterance of the name of Narayana. They agreed that Ajamila had been one nasty dude, but since he had taken the name of Narayana, he had performed the supreme tapas, and wiped out all his innumerable sins (of this lifetime and many previous ones!).

The Yama-dootas were absolutely aghast. Flabbergasted. What!- they thought. How can this be? They raced off to Lord Yama for an explanation as the dazzling beings seemed determined to stand in their way.

 Lord Yama smilingly explained to his messengers that this was indeed an extraordinary truth. Narayana and His Name are One. On uttering the name of Narayana, knowingly or unknowingly, without any faith, devotion or knowledge of what one is doing, he said one still obtains the full merit. One wipes out all one's past sins. The example is given of a strong medicine that works even when the patient has no clue as to how it works.

Ajamila meanwhile wanted to thank the Vishnu-dootas but he did not have time as they disappeared in a trice after doing the job they came to do of freeing him. He was a changed man however. He realised that God had given him a second chance and he was determined to make the most of it. He packed his bags and went to a place called "Haridwar" (meaning the door to Hari)- yes, who knows, this may be the same Haridwar that exists in the Himalayas in North India. He then did a lot of tapas, and attained devotion to Lord Vishnu. When his time was up, the same dazzling beings whom he'd met before appeared before him. After he cast off his earthly body in the sacred Ganga, he was granted a dazzling form like theirs. He then left with them for Vaikuntha, the realm of Vishnu. As a devotee of Vishnu, he attained the holy feet of Vishnu.

Some key points mentioned in the story are:

1. Utterance of the Name of God just once removes sins already committed. This occurs in an instant. However a person may still go on to sin in the future, as the sinful tendency is still present in the mind. This brings us to the next point (which explains the need for prolonged taking of the Name of God).

2. Utterance of the Name of God, many many times, over a long period of time, done as a devotional practice achieves two important spiritual goals :
i) Removes the underlying tendency of the mind to sin (does not just remove past sins)
ii) Develops true devotion for God, Prema, Bhakti which is a rare thing. And this brings us to the next point.

3. Mukti is much easier to attain than bhakti. So states the Bhagavatam. Mukti itself is rare, but Bhakti is rarer still. God gives mukti more easily than Bhakti. To attain bhakti one has to practice sincerely for some time. The fifth purushartha as per the Vishnavas is bhakti.

Now some people will call this story an exaggeration. This is meant for simple folk they will say, to encourage them to do a little japa, a little kirtan, to walk the path of bhakti, to worship Vishnu. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink- what simpletons, they will say.

But the sages, devotees and Gurus shake their head and say, no this is no exaggeration. This is the saving grace of God. He is love, He is power- His Name and He are One. Therefore it is not at all surprising that uttering His Name can give such tremendous results. Take His Name and attain the highest good they beg us.

But the majority of us are are low petty-minded people. We cannot believe that anyone can love that much. We ourselves lack love, we ourselves lack power. So we struggle to believe in the love and power of God and His Name.

Even those of us walking the spiritual path, are gripped with doubt from time to time. I include myself in the category above of low, petty-minded people. There are two sides of my mind, ever in battle.
The dominant side of my mind, by God's grace, is the one that insists on doing japa daily, no matter what. This side has strong faith in the Lord and His Name. But the weak whining doubting side is also there, asking if all this isn't just an exaggeration. The battle will continue until the Name of God itself transforms all doubts into faith and devotion.

Anyway I recommend reading this story in the Bhagavatam in the original. It is something to read the actual words (even a translation) of the characters- the Vishnu-dootas, Yama-dootas, Lord Yama, Suka and Parikshit.

The above is just an outline. Wonderful are their dialogues, wonderful are the concepts discussed. The arguments and counter-arguments. Wow is the only word that remains afterwards. I felt pretty awestruck and speechless for a while afterwards, even though I've heard the story before.

Glory to the Name of Hari. Which is none other than He.

Hari Aum Tat Sat.

The Spiritual Olympics: Going for gold

Hari Aum.

Like many people, I have been watching some of the events at the Olympics in Rio on television in the last few days. It is no secret that the Olympic athletes have trained for years to come and perform in front of the world in a short space of time to demonstrate their hard-earned skills and talents. The champions make their victory look easy- but underneath the ease of their somersaults, dives, sprints and other sporting achievements lie days, months and years of persistent effort and toil- literally, their blood, sweat and tears. Before the victory, there was much defeat. Many a fall, many an injury. But each time, those who will be champions, got up, dusted off their knees, wiped their tears, gritted their teeth and said "I will not give up" "I will do this. I can do this."

These champions are great examples for spiritual aspirants. One admires their tenacity, discipline, courage, endurance, trust in themselves, trust in their coach, trust in what they're doing.

One needs similar qualities to emerge as a spiritual olympic champion. Only in the case of spiritual olympics, we compete with ourselves, not with others. We seek conquest over our own lower nature, not over others. It is a incredible challenge. A hidden one that is not so obvious to others.

To be a spiritual Olympic champion, in other words, a self-realised being, one needs all of the tenacity, discipline and trust that the athletic Olympians have. May be more - because so much more is at stake here. We seek conquest over ignorance, disease and yes, over death itself. We seek immortality. To know our own immortal nature. We have set ourselves a great task. The sacrifice required must also therefore be great.

One key element here is faith in oneself and faith in one's coach or Guru. Every athlete has a coach who they have absolute trust in. They entrust their valuable athletic career to this person. This person commands them to sacrifice their time, their energy, their all- if they want to win that gold medal. The athlete agrees- is willing to sacrifice. Ideally the coach should themselves be a champion. Many champions go on to coach others and rightly so, because they have been there and done that. They know from experience what getting that Olympic medal takes- the physical and mental qualities that are needed. They mould their students for success.

Similar is the case with spiritual life. The spiritual coach that one chooses, should himself or herself, be a person who has excelled in spiritual life. Someone who has been there and done that. Someone who did sadhana, who knows the sacrifices involved, who knows the pitfalls and the way around them. Someone who is truly experienced. The onus is on the disciple to choose wisely and choose well. So much depends upon one's choice.

Having chosen one's coach, whether in the athletic or spiritual Olympics, one must obey the coach to succeed. When the sports coach says, "Turn up at 6 am today for 2 hours hard training"- the athlete must obey. When the spiritual coach says "Turn up at 6 am today for 2 hours of japa"- the spiritual athlete must obey. There is no other way but the hard way. Training- day after day after day.

The athlete may grumble and whine occasionally but the lure of the gold medal is there and the desire for this forces him or her to put in the required effort. The spiritual athlete may also complain and grumble at times, but the lure of spiritual gold- immortal bliss- is there and the desire for this forces him or her to do sadhana daily.

This is why the scriptures, the manuals of spiritual athletics, state that desire for the goal (mumukshutva) is so important. A burning desire in fact. Without this desire, one will not be able to make the sacrifices and effort required to attain this supreme medal.

The coach stands by watching as the athlete performs in the Olympics and jumps in joy when the athlete excels and wins a medal. Similarly is the case with the spiritual coaches or Guru. Sivananda says that the sages and celestials dance in joy when a soul breaks free of the trammels of samsara and flies free into the spiritual sky.

Let us then, go for gold in spiritual life. Gold in spiritual life is God. For this we need, burning desire for gold, for God.

Let us have immense faith in ourselves. This is the first qualification. We have to believe we can do it. Those who have no faith in themselves, get nowhere- both in material and spiritual endeavours.

Let us also have faith in our goal, our spiritual gold. That this gold we want is worth it. And we feel it is worth it. That gold is God- who represents immortality, wisdom, bliss, truth and freedom from desires, pains and sorrows.
We are tired of worldly toys, we've been here and done this over and over again. It's time to move on (with our consciousness I mean). So let's get moving.

Having decided that we want the spiritual gold, and that we can do it, let us then find a suitable coach (known as Guru in spiritual life) who has attained the gold and ask them to show us how to do the same. There are many such coaches, in all spiritual traditions, we need to find one who resonates with us and then stick tenaciously to their teaching.

Summary of requirements needed to win the spiritual Olympics gold medal:

1. One needs to want the spiritual gold medal. Need to want it enough to make great sacrifices of time, energy and life.
2. One needs to believe that one has what it takes to get this gold. One must be willing to develop within oneself, through hard spiritual training, that which is required to attain this.
3. One needs a spiritual coach, who has been there and done that, who has attained the spiritual gold medal. One then needs to obey the teacher's advice, no matter how tough, to get the spiritual gold medal oneself.

P.S. There are no shortcuts in winning medals, be it the athletic Olympics or spiritual Olympics. Just like an Olympic champion who has won gold, can only show the way to another, but the other has to put in the effort, similarly a spiritual coach or Guru can only show the way. It is up to the disciple to put in all the effort. No room for any spiritual freebies or short-cuts. The Guru cannot and will not just touch someone and give them supreme realisation without the disciple first having done much sadhana and become deserving. So one needs to pick up that mala, or the havan spoon, or stand on one's head, or do whatever sadhana one has chosen and just keep doing it. The results will come with absolute certainty as they have for those before us.

I will conclude with a poem by Walter D. Wintle, who lived in the last century, that I particularly like and which is relevant here:

Title: The Man who thinks he can

"If you think you are beaten, you are.
If you think you dare not, you don't."

If you'd like to win, but you think you can't
It's almost certain you won't."

"If you think you'll lose, you're lost."

"For out of the world, we find,
Success begins with a fellow's will;
It's all in the state of mind."

"If you think you're outclassed you are;
You've got to think high to rise."

"You've got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win that prize."

"Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man;"

"But sooner or later the man who wins
Is the man who thinks he can."


Hari Aum Tat Sat

Mantra: the philosopher's stone

Hari Aum.

I was reflecting on the power of mantra recently. What mantra has achieved for humanity from time immemorial to current times. As per our scriptures and sages, mantra is the energy of God, in fact it is God. A moksha mantra is the key to revealing our true nature as one with God. Okay we've all heard the theory. We know all this. We've read this time and again in different books. What about our experience of mantra? What has mantra done for us personally? To know this one has to repeat a mantra for a little while. It's like going to the gym to get fit. It's no good going once or twice and then standing in front of the mirror checking to see if one's biceps look bigger or one's tummy looks more toned. No - it takes weeks, months, may be a few years to get that fit toned physical body. Same thing with the mantra. It takes weeks, months, may be a few years to get that fit toned mantra mind. No point saying the mantra for 1-2 days and hoping for the spiritual biceps to immediately look bigger. That ain't going to happen. All good things come with time. And not necessarily after millennia as some despondent spiritual aspirants say - mantra is about speeding up God realisation. What would have taken millennia can take place in a lifetime or even part of a lifetime as per our sages. What is required is dogged determination and regular daily practice. We need to work those spiritual biceps every day with the mantra.

Anyway. I was reflecting how mantra is the be-all and end-all in a sense in spiritual life (on the mantra yoga path- there are of course other valid paths to God too- but the mantra is one of the most powerful).
Great yogis became great (or rather discovered their inherent greatness that was always there) with the help of the mantra. It would be reasonable in fact to say, that it was the mantra that revealed the extraordinary nature of the ordinary human being that took refuge in it. In other words, that the mantra is truly the philosopher's stone. It transforms the crude human rock into pristine divine gold.

It is important for us to recognise this as seekers in order to keep up our motivation and our practice. It is strange how people treat Gurus in one of two ways. Ignorant people dismiss true spiritual Gurus as fake, as frauds. Such people are to be pitied, but one day, they too will embrace a Guru- it is simply a matter of time and their evolution (this is the Lila of God that such persons exist).

Equally, and just as worryingly, genuine seekers eulogise the Guru's personality and refuse to believe the Guru when he/she says that our nature is the same as the Guru, the same as God. For example a mantra yogi Guru declares to the disciple "My friend, I gained whatever I did in spiritual life, by taking refuge in the mantra. I recited this so so often, virtually constantly. Pleased by my devotion to mantra, the deity of the mantra revealed Himself/Herself to me and I attained the Supreme Being. You too can do the same."

The last sentence is the critical part that we find hard to accept "You too can do the same". "No no" we say to the Guru. "You are great, you were born for greatness, you were a great yogi in the last xyz number of lifetimes- that is why you attained God in your one lifetime. I am a poor miserable soul, drowned in samsara- what hope is there for me- I will have to do sadhana for millions of lifetimes." With these thoughts apathy sets in- one subconsciously feels- "What is the rush- it'll take a few million lifetimes anyway".
The intensity of sadhana drops with this sort of negative thinking. This is also a way of disrespecting the mantra. The mantra is the ultimate transforming energy of God- how can one say that it will work so slowly on us? Are we saying that even God cannot transform us, though it transformed so many others?
It is foolish to have such faith in the lowness of our own character, and so much doubt in the mantra. How about reversing the situation? Let us have faith in the divine transforming power of the mantra, and let us doubt our the reality of our weaknesses (this is not to say we don't have weaknesses- this is to say the mantra is stronger than any weakness in us). In reality, let us remember, we are children of the Divine after all.

To emphasise the greatness of the mantra, I would like to say that as per our own sages, the mantra is everything, and the yogi himself/herself is and was nothing without the mantra.

Some examples from the Puranas and more recent times of great yogis who attained God through mantra:

1. Ratnakar was nothing before Rama mantra. He was a scoundrel, a criminal. Recitation of Rama mantra (repeated backwards as "Mara Mara") transformed the scoundrel into the great saint Valmiki, the one who told the story of Sri Rama in the form of the beautiful Ramayana.

Just to emphasise this point, I am expressing this view in the form of an equation:

Ratnakar + Rama mantra =  Saint Valmiki.

Ratnakar - Rama mantra = Nothing, utter scoundrel

2. Ajamila was nothing before uttering the name of Narayana. He was a miserable fallen man. Recitation of the Name of Narayana instantly purified and uplifted him to new spiritual heights. He became a great devotee of the Lord though the mere utterance of His Name

Ajamila + Name of Narayana = Saintly person
Ajamila - Name of Narayana= Fallen miserable man

3. Gopaler Ma  (great disciple of Ramakrishna Paramhamsa) was nothing before she took to reciting the Gopala mantra. The mantra washed off her false personality and revealed the Divine within. She saw Gopala alone everywhere, she realised her oneness with the Divine.

Gopaler Ma + Gopala mantra = Extraordinary saintly lady
Gopaler Ma - Gopala mantra = Very ordinary lady


4. Dr Kuppuswami (later Swami Sivananda) was a doctor. A kind man. A good man. But not a sage until he started repeating the mantra "Om Namo Bhagavate Vaasudevaya". He recited this mantra incessantly and frequently- for years. He developed his spiritual biceps patiently for years. The mantra removed from this the wrong notion that he was Dr Kuppuswami or Swami Sivananda. It revealed to him that he was one with Lord Vasudeva Himself. Great was Dr Kuppuswami's delight on realising this - as he himself expressed in his poems about realising God. The doctor became Swami Sivananda to the world, but in reality, within himself, he was none other than Vasudeva.

Dr Kuppuswami + Om Namo Bhagavate Vasudevaya mantra = Swami Sivananda, God Realised saint and great world teacher
Dr Kuppuswami - Om Namo Bhagavate Vasudevaya mantra = Ordinary human doctor

5. Sridhar Rao was a noble gentle being. A great disciple of Sivananda. He was given the monastic name Swami Chidananda. He did kind deeds, he was gentle and compassionate. He took seriously to recitation of a Rama mantra. Day in day out he recited this mantra and remembered Lord Rama.
The Rama mantra transformed Sridhar Rao or Swami Chidananda completely. It showed him that he was neither Mr Rao, nor Swami Chidananda. It showed him that he was one with Sri Rama Himself. 

In other words,

Sridhar Rao + Rama mantra = Swami Chidananda, great saint and God Realised soul
Sridhar Rao - Rama mantra = Ordinary kind human being

The point I am making here is that it is the mantra that gives everything to the yogi. The mantra gives purity, sattva, sadhana shakti, faith, devotion, conviction, surrender, protection, determination, perseverance, transformation and God Realisation. In the highest sense, the yogi does nothing, the mantra does everything.

Yogis are not born. They are primarily made. Yes some great yogis have done yoga sadhana in previous lifetimes. But they are not born perfect (like their disciples write in the biographies). No they were not born perfect. Many of them were like us initially. They had similar failings as us. They rose from strength to strength through sadhana. And they told us we can too.

This is the key point here.
They told us this is our birthright in fact. Sivananda states that God Realisation is our birthright. It is neither a fancy fictitious goal. Nor it is so impossibly high and pure a goal that it is beyond our reach. No- it is not too low nor too high a goal.
It is simply our birthright. That is all. Simply by being born human, we have a right to strive for this goal. We have a right to ask God for this goal. But we have to ask. Then God will give. As Jesus said "Ask and it shall be given to you". As Krishna said "Give up all dharmas and seek refuge in Me alone". We have to recognise that this is something we want. And then ask.
Recitation of the mantra is simply asking. Asking for devotion, asking for knowledge, asking for liberation. These are the things the Guru asks us to ask God for. We ask through mantra recitation.

If you are a mantra yogi, create your own equations above. We have to know that our destiny, as children of the divine, is to return to the divine. Being one with God is natural to us, it is our very nature. Being God Realised is not some supercool state where everyone admires us. It's just a state where we stop feeling that there are others and us (there is no us to be admired). It is a state where we see God and God alone everywhere, within us and without us. This is a state that cannot be described, we have to each experience it ourselves, and we will one day. There is no doubt about this.

Your equation:

You + your mantra = God Realised Being (of the future, assuming you are on your way but not yet there :)
You- your mantra= Ordinary human being

I am going to write my equation to motivate myself too:

Vishnupriya + Om Namo Narayanaya mantra = God Realised Being (of the future - not there yet ;)
Vishnupriya - Om Namo Narayanaya mantra = Nothing, ordinary human being


Let us dare to do it. Let us dare to believe it. As the ordinary people before us did. If we don't believe in ourselves, nobody else will. Let us doubt our doubts and have faith in the mantra, Guru and God. Let us take refuge in our mantras like never before. We have the same tools, the mantras, as the yogis before us. We are the yogis of today, we walk in the footsteps of the yogis of the past. The mantra will ensure our success in spiritual life as it did for the yogis before us.

As the Upanisads say "Arise. Awake. And stop not till the Goal is reached".
Let us keep up that mantra practice until that Goal is reached.

Hari Aum Tat Sat

Eklavya, true discipleship and the Guru principle

Hari Aum.

I have been wanting to write about Eklavya and the Guru principle for a while and today is a good day- as it is Thursday, the day of the Guru.

There are some lessons we can learn from the story of Eklavya about how to be a true disciple. Two great lessons from his story are the vital importance of faith and obedience in order to benefit from a true Guru.

The famous Guru strothram culminates in the statement "Moksha moolam Guru kripa"- i.e. the root/basis of moksha (liberation from idea of false identity/realisation of one's true nature) is the kripa or Grace of the Guru. How is kripa to be attained? As Sivananda used to say, "First deserve, then desire"- meaning first become deserving of kripa/moksha, then only can one hope to receive this.

How then to become deserving? Well, obey the Guru, follow his/her precepts. As Sivananda was fond of saying "Exert, exert, do purushartha"- make a sincere effort in doing sadhana. Do sadhana daily no matter what, remember God frequently (or constantly depending on one's capacity) no matter what, stick to virtue no matter how others behave, keep good company to gain inspiration- again and again raise the mind up from the ditch of samsaric thoughts into the skies of noble spiritual thoughts. Hang in there no matter what. Persistence, diligence, dogged determination. This is needed. This will bring Grace. In fact, this itself is Grace. One just has to get up and do sadhana every day. Every single day.

The lower mind may complain. O my measuring stick doesn't show any results from the sadhana so why continue. Vishnu has not walked into my house and presented me with a lotus though I have been saying His Name for a while. Grumble...grumble....the mind may say, I want to see results.

Then the higher mind replies- you want to measure the effects of the Name of God? That Name which no sage, rishi or even God Himself is able to describe fully the glories? That Name O mind you want to measure with your tiny little ruler of the human intellect? That is futile.
But rest assured, O mind. If the practice of mantra was a new method invented by you, one may have rightly worried that this may lead us nowhere. But the mantra has been around a very long time. Many have practiced japa of mantra and attained God. There is nothing new or special in this. This is natural to the Name of God. Therefore have faith, and keep it up. No point brandishing the human intellect and bleating "I want proof that I am progressing". The human intellect cannot even explain it's own existence, where it came from, and why it exists.
 No need therefore to try to pretend it can discover details of how the mantra of God works. Just say the mantra and feel the benefits. Simple. That's what those who felt the benefits of this practice advise.
Best to do as they say. This is called faith. Trusting someone, trusting that the sages spoke the truth, having the heart to recognise who to trust (and who not to), this is called spiritual maturity, this is called faith (wise sattvic faith, not destructive/tamasic foolish faith). When the heart becomes a little clean (i.e. a little virtuous), faith is able to develop. This faith is the basis of developing further virtue through sadhana- so faith and virtue are a positive cycle. Faith is the Grace of God.

Faith then is the basis of true discipleship. This brings us back to the topic of Eklavya and his Guru. Most of us are familiar with the story. We know that Eklavya was a child belonging to a simple hunting clan living in the forests in the era of the Pandavas. He had a natural inborn talent for archery and wanted to learn this art formally from Guru Drona, a master in archery and other forms of warrior-arts. He approached Drona and pleaded with him to accept him as a disciple. But Drona refused as he had accepted the Pandava princes as his disciples and wanted to ensure there was no-one who could match Arjuna in archery. He therefore sent Eklavya away.

Eklavya was broken-hearted by this rejection but determined to learn archery in whatever way he could. He created an image of Guru Drona from clay and worshiped it daily. He learned exceptional archery skills in this way. The sheer faith and love he had for his Guru, forced the Guru (God) principle in the image to respond by teaching him. Let us remember the true Guru is none but God Himself. And God is everywhere including in images and idols.

Later Eklavya's extraordinary skill came to the notice of Guru Drona who asked who taught him. Eklavya smilingly said it was Guru Drona himself! Drona then requested a 'dakshina'- the traditional gift from disciple to Guru, to give thanks for his teaching. He requested the thumb of Eklavya's right hand. This seemingly strange request was made because it would effectively ensure that Eklavya went from being an exceptional archer (better than Arjuna) to just a very mediocre one.

Eklavya, though understanding the unfair intention of his Guru Drona, unhesitatingly cut off his thumb and gave it to his Guru. This act in particular demonstrated the outstanding and glorious discipleship of Eklavya and made his name famous everywhere as the very embodiment of a true disciple.

Fortunately true spiritual Gurus who are One with God (unlike Drona who was simply a warrior-arts Guru) want only our own spiritual growth and welfare as their dakshina/gift (not our thumbs or anything else- though in truth, all things that belong to us in reality belong to the Guru/God).

Legend has it that Eklavya's father was a supporter of the evil king Jarasandha who was against Krishna. Eklavya later fought on Jarasandha's side and was slain by Krishna. But this does not make him less of a great disciple. His name is still remembered as a example of perfect discipleship. He was truly a marvelous character.

Obedience to the Guru is everything to the disciple. The disciple chooses the Guru, not the other way around. Actually God matches the Guru and the disciple.
 Once the Guru has accepted the request of an individual to be taken on as a disciple, the onus is on the disciple to obey the Guru and learn from him/her. No true Guru asks for the disciple to come to him/her. It is the disciple who requests the Guru to teach him/her so that the disciple can attain the highest goal of life.
The Guru and disciple both then play their roles to allow the relationship to bear fruit i.e. lead to the realisation of the disciple as one with Guru and God.
The Guru who is One with God gives true instructions to the disciple that will lead to the latter's highest welfare. And disciple is expected to make full use of the Grace of the Guru by faithfully following and practicing the precepts of the Guru.

Eklavya is an inspiration to all of us as spiritual disciples as an excellent example of faith and obedience to the Guru. He did not live near his Guru but he learnt everything from his Guru.
Our Guru also may have left His/Her physical body. We may lament- alas I never got to meet my Guru. But this is all destiny. This is how it was meant to be. If we are meant to meet our Guru in their living frame/body, we will. If we are meant to discover our Guru after they leave the physical cage, then so be it - that is also the will of God. Both are equally good as both are the will of God.
Living in close proximity to a Guru physically does not necessarily grant faster spiritual progress than living further away. It is the practice of the Guru's teachings that draws the presence of the Guru and the kripa of the Guru. Physical contact with a Guru is less important that mental contact with the Guru via His/Her teachings and practicing these in right earnest.
(One example of this is that Malati Tapovan living far away from her Guru Sivananda attained God, but many others living in close proximity to him in the Ashram did not).

Guru is a principle, Guru is the wise teacher aspect of God. Guru is not a human cage. Guru is the Consciousness of the Supreme Being that temporarily inhabits a physical cage so that some work can be done on this planet through that cage. When the cage is dropped, it does not mean that the Consciousness of the Guru also drops out of existence.

The Guru is Eternal Consciousness, God Consciousness, eternal, immortal, ever-accessible by the sincere disciple.

Our pictures of our Gurus in our meditation rooms and our altars are as alive as the Guru in his/her physical cage was. Why? Because as mentioned above, God is everywhere, God manifesting as Guru is everywhere. The Guru watches us do our sadhana in front of Him/Her, listens to our woes and miseries, our exultation and joys.

The Guru is our closest friend and confidante. The Guru mantra is the greatest treasure in the three worlds given by the Guru Himself/Herself as a great tool to realise one's nature as the same as God and Guru. The Guru keeps nothing from us, and gives us everything. As the scriptures say, there is no relative or friend like the Guru. Earthly relatives are for this lifetime only; in the next lifetime, they may not be related to us or know us.

But the Guru knows us in every life, the Guru never leaves us. We may leave the Guru, but the Guru does not abandon us. The Guru stays with us until we complete our journey and attain to the same pristine state as the Guru Him/Herself, as God Himself/Herself.

Om Sri Gurave Namah.
Prostrations again and again at the holy feet of all true Gurus. May they bless us to become worthy disciples and attain the Supreme Goal of life, which as Sivananda says, is our birthright.

Here is a beautiful rendition of the Guru ashtakam composed by the great Adi Shankara.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QqCji-oDTlA

The meaning of renunciation and detachment

Hari Aum.

Renunciation and detachment are said to be the essence of spirituality. I would like to share my understanding on these subjects as I see them. This is partly because I feel these are much misunderstood concepts, and that the misunderstanding of these can cause serious harm to oneself and others. I have had direct experience of this harm in my own life and would like to enable others to avoid this if possible.

Renunciation and detachments are qualities of the mind. Contrary to popular belief, renunciation is not about leaving one's relatives, one's job and donning the orange robe. And equally, detachment is not about becoming cold and unloving, about shutting off one's emotions, or about becoming robot-like.

Renunciation is letting go of the idea of me and mine. Detachment means letting go of desire for worldly things. Both primarily involve an inner change in angle of vision. Instead of saying 'my husband', 'my wife', 'my child', 'my parents'- there is a subtle change, and one instead begins to think 'God as my husband', 'God as my wife', 'God as my parents', 'God as my child' and so on. The husband, wife, child and parents are not to be necessarily discarded. The feeling of 'my' is to be discarded. The understanding needs to be developed that all is God- and that God is manifesting as one's home, one's family, one's workmates and so on.

Equally detachment means getting detached from the idea of me and mine, and letting go of desire for worldly things. It involves developing a desire for, an attachment to God. Swami Sivananda used to say "Detach and attach". Detach your mind's desires from the world, and attach your mind's desires to God. As explained above, this does not mean you leave the world (you cannot anyway) - it means you leave the idea of the world, and develop the idea of God. You begin to feel that the world itself is God in manifestation.

The development of this angle of vision of seeing only God everywhere and wanting God alone, is called true renunciation and true detachment. This involves loving the whole world as one's family (not ceasing to love everybody including one's family). This involves loving the world as a manifestation of God.

In the twelve years since I discovered  my Guru and yoga, I have met quite a few Swamis who seem to have an incorrect notion of detachment. As a result, many of them have become rather cold and lack compassion for fellow human beings and also sometimes towards themselves. This is not detachment. This is himsa or violence- towards oneself and others. This cannot lead anywhere good on the spiritual path.

Equally renunciation is not about replacement. It is not about replacing one's home with a large Ashram, or about replacing one's job with the role of the head of an Ashram or acquiring some important job in an Ashram. It is not about giving up one's name and fame in the regular world, and trying to obtain name and fame as a Swami. It is not about replacing one's small-time home/job/family with an even grander home/job/family in the name of Sannyas. This is what quite a few Sannyasis seem to do today.
They leave their relatives and acquire many new relatives in the form of disciples/students/fellow seekers, they leave their small or big job and obtain an even bigger job with greater name/fame as a Spiritual Director, Ashram founder, Trustee or something similar. After acquiring more name, fame, wealth and relatives that the average house-holder they then look down upon the poor house-holder and suggest he/she is not 'renounced' enough,  when they have supposedly 'renounced' everything. What sort of renunciation is this? It is a mockery of Sannyas.

I am not saying that Sannyasis should not live in big Ashrams and fly around the world to teach people. This is vitally important. But why call allow yourself to be called Guru Maharaj, praised and flattered by all? Why all this before attaining God which is the reason one took sannayas? Many God-realised teachers have come; today their teachings are available to all in the form of many centres, books and, best of all, via online access. We do not need more and more teachers with no direct experience of God.

After attaining God, one can teach and hold great titles if God desires this. All great spiritual teachers of humanity who were really able to uplift and truly serve humanity first discovered the pearl of spirituality within the ocean of their mind. They had direct experience of God.
They did not become Guru Maharaj, MahaMandaleshwar, Ashram Director, Founder of XYZ spiritual organisation etc etc first. This may have occurred later and was as worthless as straw to them- what value can such titles have, that represent praise from mere human beings, when one has obtained the Grace of God Himself? Does one need a certificate of approval from human beings when one has got this from God Himself?

Equally obtaining such praise from human beings, without first attaining God, can become a serious obstacle in the life of the unwary seeker after God. Power and fame have lead to the downfall of many a yogi.

Anyway my point is, claiming to be a renunciate after acquiring a large ashram, a number of disciples, fame, wealth and power is nonsense (if one has not yet attained God). Far better for spiritual life to be a simple unassuming house-holder with less trappings of name/fame/power etc.

Another thing about being a house-holder is that your family will freely criticise you if they don't like something- you will get ample opportunity to test yourself in the face of abuse and injury! On the other hand, if you become a great sannyasi, people will simply touch your feet all day, nobody will dare criticise you (because if they do, you will be displeased and kick them out of your ashram)- and in the absence of criticism, your ego will get fatter and fatter. And that is the end of your spiritual life.

So my message for young 20-somethings who have recently discovered spirituality and are consumed with the fire of renunciation is be very cautious. Think deeply about your life. Do not be too hasty in dumping your family, your job and everything else. Ask yourself- can you see God in your family? Can you see God in your workplace?  Or do you feel you can only see God in an Ashram? Are you seeking after name and fame in joining an Ashram, or are you happy to be an unheard-of  nobody there? If you truly examine your conscience and find it clear, and feel the best way you can serve humanity and God is by joining an Ashram, then by all means do so. On the other hand, if your conscience pricks you regarding your parents and dependents, do not abandon them- listen to your conscience, feel the presence of God in your parents/family and serve them well. This will also lead you to God.

And do not make the mistake that I made if possible. The wise learn from the mistakes of others (though sometimes you just have to make your own mistakes, suffer and learn the hard way). At the age of 22 when I discovered my Guru, while in my second year at medical school, I announced to my family that I was going to leave my studies and join the Sivananda organisation as a volunteer/karma yogi (with the view to taking vows of brahmacharya and later sannyas). I thought this was the only way to God. My mother shed tears and threatened to throw me out of the house and not speak to me at all. The rest of my family were annoyed and confused. My fiance who I broke up was extremely upset by my behaviour. I remained unmoved by all their tears and threats, thinking this was all a test of my courage and determination. I felt that although difficult I must walk this path. I caused a lot of pain to others and felt pain myself. I approached the most senior Swami in the organisation and asked her for permission to join them- she advised me to finish my studies and only then make my decision- she said you must finish what you have started.

Reluctantly then, I decided to continue my studies but made an arrangement with my mother that I would do this only if I was allowed to move out of home and live in the local Sivananda Centre. I said that before joining them for good, I wanted to observe them closely. I wanted to see if the private life of the Swamis and Ashram residents matched their public face in the satsangs. It was a wise decision that I made. The scales fell from my eyes. I found that the Swamis and brahmacharis were genuinely good people for the most part, but they were not more saintly than anyone outside the Ashram. They also had petty jealousies, power struggles, anger issues etc like anyone else. Some of them seemed cold and cut off from emotions in the name of renunciation and detachment. I decided that I did not want to join an organisation and get caught in internal struggles for name, fame and power.

In the meantime I found joy and inspiration in my medical work. I felt that it was my vocation to make my medical work into a sadhana. Hence my decision to continue as a doctor in the world (for now anyway- man proposes and God disposes so one never knows what the future holds).

My point is that any job can be yoga (not just the Swami job), you can teach yourself to see God in anyone (even your family, not just Ashram dwellers). By all means join an Ashram if that's what you want to do, but understand your intention well, and examine your conscience thoroughly to ensure you are really acting unselfishly in doing this.

And one final message for those spiritual house-holders who are made to feel inferior for being house-holders by Swamis (who are Directors/Mandaleshwars etc). Remember far better being a lowly house-holder than a powerful Swami.

Power and God do not mix well. Stay humble, do sadhana, and fear not. If you have a mantra, you have the treasure of the world with you. The orange robe and kamandalu (water pot) are not the essence of sannyas. The mantra is the essence of sannyas. The essence of renunciation and detachment is the mantra. Get mantra diksha if possible, and water the seed of mantra sown in you with regular daily practice. Serve all well seeing God in them. This is very difficult but has to be done to make spiritual progress.

Keep quiet and tolerate insults/abuse from your wife/husband seeing God only in them- that is much more difficult to do than renouncing them and will lead you to God quicker. ;) (I am not saying one should tolerate domestic abuse here obviously- that is unacceptable. My point is, one should learn not to react to every petty criticism that people make including one's own so-called near and dear ones).

But seriously, my Guru also said that one should change one's mindset to that of a renunciate to make spiritual progress, not merely change one's external circumstances. Changing one outer circumstances is relatively easy, changing one's mindset is much more difficult but essential.

Also I like to remind myself that Malati Tapovan Mataji, a simple unassuming housewife disciple of Sivananda attained God as a result of tapas done while living in her ordinary home in Delhi looking after her husband and three children, while many Sanyasis who had 'renounced' their homes and were living near Sivananda did not attain God at all.

The sannyas path is the right path to God for some, the house-holder path is the right path to God for others. Let nobody tell the spiritual house-holder than he/she cannot be a renunciate, and that he/she cannot attain God. Renunciation and detachment are of the mind.  Let us request God Himself to decide what path we should walk at any point in time - householder renunciate, or ashram-dweller renunciate, or wandering renunciate. That is the only way we can ensure we're walking on the right path.

Hari Aum Tat Sat

Pingala's example: overcoming despondency in spiritual life

Hari Aum.

Despondency is a common and serious obstacle in the spiritual path. This is likely to grip most sadhakas at some point or the other during their spiritual life. One may be gripped occasionally by a mood of anxiety and melancholy - at such times one may wonder,  how can this herculean task of controlling the mind be achieved? How can all desires be eradicated? When will the mind be freed of the six enemies of spiritual life (pride, anger, lust, greed, envy and delusion)? When will jnana dawn? When will bhakti be attained? When will the ego be transcended? When will God be attained?

One hears the clarion call of one's Guru and other spiritual greats saying "Exert. Do sadhana. Reveal your true nature as we have done". But the mind asks all the questions described above- essentially wondering how this is ever going to happen.

One quails at the thought of comparing oneself to a Sivananda or a Vivekananda. One thinks I am like an ant, they are like an elephant- where is the comparison? One may sometimes despair at one's own mind which repeatedly runs after sense objects, which can only think of God for a limited time in the day before it needs a dose of worldly thoughts. How can one compare oneself with the spiritual greats who thought of nothing but God in order to attain God? The mind may make assumptions such as "I'm sure the minds of the spiritual greats were never as weak and worldly as my mind is....it's going to take aeons for me to attain God".

This type of despairing negative thinking reduces one's motivation on the spiritual path and becomes a serious obstacle and a self-fulfilling prophecy. If one believes one cannot attain God, one will not exert properly and one will not attain God. On the other hand, if one believes one has a chance, one will exert maximally and the rest is in the hands of Guru and God- at least one can say one tried one's best (and God surely will help those who help themselves as the yogis say).

At times like this it is useful to remember the lives of certain people from the Puranas. For example the story of Pingala. Pingala was a lady who slept with people for money - in modern terms, a sex-worker. She focused on the bodily pleasures alone with little interest in spiritual matters. One day, the story goes, a thief brought her a parrot as a gift. Someone had taught the parrot to say the mantra /name of God "Rama". The parrot frequently said "Rama, Rama!" and Pingala found this name interesting and pleasing to the ear and also began to say "Rama, Rama". Over time by repeating saying "Rama", her mind was purified and she attained God. And as per the Puranas, she attained God one lifetime I may add (not millions of lifetimes).

If a lady without any interest in spiritual matters such as Pingala could attain God in one lifetime by simply uttering the name of God without even understanding its meaning, then why not the rest of us? We can tell our mind "We may not be a Sivananda or a Vivekananda, but surely we are not less than Pingala. We can do what she did. We must have a chance if she had!". It may take one lifetime or more depending on the will of God, but we need not despair. (We know of other Puranic characters too such as Ajamila and Ratnakar/Valmiki who started at a very low level and attained spiritual heights by uttering the name of God).

The yogis say the name of God is infinitely powerful and purifying for the mind. Who then are we to say "It is bound to take millions of lifetimes"- is this not demonstrative of a lack of faith in the name of God. It may take millions of lifetimes to attain God or one or a few- let God decide. But let us note that, based on the Puranas, He does not keep people who say His name repeatedly waiting for millions of lifetimes- as demonstrated in the case of Pingala and yogis of modern times.

Plenty of yogis were arrogant, ignorant and downright unspiritual at the start of their spiritual lives- they were transformed by contact with their Guru and the name of God. Examples of modern saints who started off rather unspiritually include Swami Chinmayananda and Swami Vishnudevananda. Swami Chinmaya went all the way up to Rishikesh to write some nasty things about how Swamis are a hoax. However the holy atmosphere and sadhus transformed his nature and his latent spiritual samskaras unfolded and he did intense tapas for years and is said to have attained God.

Similarly Swami Vishnu refused to bow down at the feet of his Guru Sivananda on their first encounter thinking why should I bow down to any Swami! Swami Sivananda understood his thinking and surprised him by prostrating fully before him - this act taught Swami Vishnu the importance of humility and the understanding that God resides in everyone- he then became Sivananda's disciple, did intense tapas, spread yoga teaching and the Om Namo Narayanaya mantra around the world for peace.

So plenty of people who became spiritual greats in one lifetime had latent spiritual samskaras but also serious flaws of pride, ignorance etc at the start of their spiritual lives. In one lifetime, they took the name of God and thus allowed it to transform them completely and realised their true nature as one with God.

Why then shall we despair? Let pride, anger, delusion and other negative emotions assail us again and again - we simply need to continue our practice which will weaken these negative qualities with time, and strengthen the opposite positive qualities of humility, patience, wisdom, kindness and so on.

If Pingala could do it, then by God, so can we. Nil desperandum, never despair - as Sivananda says. It was possible for other yogis in one lifetime. It may be our destiny too- we will never know if we don't try.

Om Namo Narayanaya.  Om Namo Narayanaya. Om Namo Narayanaya.

Hari Aum Tat Sat

P.S. 
6.5.2016:
I was reading the autobiography of Sivananda (available free online on the Divine Life Society website) recently. I was under the impression that he did japa standing hip deep in the Ganga for 12 hours a day for 12 years non-stop before he got the Darshan of Sri Krishna. It appears I was wrong. He did indeed do this sadhana of doing japa standing hip-deep in the water for hours at a time, but he combined this with a very active element of service to society as a manifestation of God. He set up a free dispensary and found time to treat sick people (was a doctor before he became a monk) and did this during much of the 12 year sadhana period. He also spent time daily in study of spiritual books such as the Gita and Upanisads, and also from time to time, visited Mahatmas to obtain their blessings. In his autobiography, he writes that japa and karma yoga must be combined for genuine spiritual progress. He advises years of hard work in service of society alongside japa as absolutely essential ingredients for spiritual progress as this purifies the mind and develops noble qualities such as compassion, patience etc.

I have sometimes thought to myself that my medical work interferes with my ability to do hours and hours of japa, and have at times been slightly despondent that I do not have the capacity to do 10-12 hours of japa a day at present. I wondered if I was doing enough to make some decent progress in this life.

As per his autobiography, Gurudev took renunciation in Rishikesh in 1924 aged around 36 years after giving up his medical career abroad. He then went on a pilgrimage in 1925 and mentions another one in 1931. So he was clearly not doing 12 hours japa every day standing in the Ganga in Rishikesh for 12 years as he was going on pilgrimages etc-  though he was most likely doing this mentally all the time/for many hours a day. Between 1926 and 1930, there is no mention of any travel etc- I assume during this time he remained in his kutir in Rishikesh doing intense tapas. He is said to have attained God somewhere between 1924-1934 before starting the DLS in 1936.

Anyway, this gives me some encouragement that I'm on the right path, and that my medical career is not an obstacle but rather a help, and doing japa while immersed in external activity can still be a means to God. One has to keep reminding oneself again and again and keep the self-doubts at bay.

Also it is useful to remind oneself that spiritual life is a marathon. Not a sprint. One needs endurance, perseverance, self-belief, grit, discipline, determination and training to successfully run a marathon. One needs similar mental stamina to keep running the spiritual marathon. One should also never be tempted to wildly start sprinting fast in a marathon- that will result in prematurely burning up all one's energy and will prevent one from being able to complete the run. Pacing oneself is vital to ensure one completes the marathon.
 Similarly one should never impulsively try to do insane amounts of meditation/japa for several hours a day without careful thought and planning- if one can do this comfortably then well and good, but excessive strain and tension is not at all good- one does not want to burn out and stop altogether.

One cannot stop during a marathon, one has to keep running, even if slowly at times, and faster at other times. Because if you stop you lose momentum and it's harder to start again. Same thing with spiritual sadhana- at times one may do a lot and intensely, at other times one may slow down and do less, but every day one needs to do something- some japa, some meditation etc- one simply has to keep running until one reaches the destination.

Hari Aum Tat Sat