Friday 11 October 2019

The ego and self-esteem

Hari Aum.

The ego is described by yogis as the key obstacle in the attainment of God. What is the ego? It is the sense of feeling separate from the all-pervading God (who is present in all creatures and things), as opposed to feeling one with Him/Her/That/all creation. It also includes pride, anger, likes, dislikes and other qualities of mind.

Sivananda describes the ego in detail here:

http://sivanandaonline.org/public_html/?cmd=displaysection&section_id=817

The goal of every seeker is to merge one's individual ego in the Cosmic ego or Supreme Being which is described as the state of God-realisation or Self-realisation.

By the way, I have noticed a curious habit amongst some people in spiritual organisations. People in positions of authority (such as a leader, teacher, Swami etc) in these places sometimes take it upon themselves to 'test' other people's egos. I have both seen and heard of various Swamis, senior brahmacharis and others who treat people harshly and then claim to be doing it for their own good, to test the egos of the people they are being harsh to.

According to Sivananda and other gurus, the only ego that every spiritual seeker should be working on is their own. Taking it upon oneself to 'test' other people's egos is only a method of increasing one'e own ego-- not helpful in spiritual life. The only people who can really test anyone's ego is a true, self-realised Guru who is one with God. Spiritual seekers, even if they may have been practising for a while, are not in any position to test anybody. Being deliberately harsh to others breaks the cardinal rule of ahimsa (non-violence). This creates negative karma and can only lead to one's own downfall. One should not therefore take it upon oneself to 'test' anybody's ego.

Equally, one should not allow oneself to be mistreated in the name of spirituality. In general, one should not put up with nasty treatment by others thinking that they are only doing it for our own good, that they are testing our ego etc (A real guru may be appear to be harsh at times but is genuinely acting for our welfare-- but there are very few real gurus around on the planet).

Being spiritual does not mean being a doormat. Having a healthy sense of self-esteem and confidence is necessary on the spiritual path. One has to have faith in oneself along with faith in God and Guru in order to succeed in spiritual life. A person who despises him/herself will not get very far. One has to be kind to oneself as well as to others to make progress in spiritual life. One has to be accepting of one's own flaws and work on them patiently and equally, be accepting of other people's flaws (and realise that they are also evolving in their own way).

The yogis say that one should cultivate compassion towards those who are suffering, indifference towards those who are wicked and delight in the company of the good. This, they say, leads to calmness of mind and helps one to progress in spiritual life. This is said to be the yogic way to conquer one's own ego and attain God.

Hari Aum Tat Sat