The head and the heart: war and peace

 Hari Aum.

I thought it would be interesting to reflect a bit on two important aspects of the human mind, namely the head and the heart, and their connection. The head represents our intellect, and the heart represents our feelings and intuition.

Both of these aspects of our being are very important and have their own role in our lives. When they function well, when they are in harmony with each other, they can enable us to live a life that is true to ourselves, that is joyful and fulfilling. A head and heart working together, that are on the same page, allow us to feel peace and bliss. And when we feel this way, we are naturally much more likely to be healthy, inspired and productive. All aspects of our life, both spiritual and material, progress well when we experience this inner peace, this inner harmony between head and heart.

In contrast, when these two, the head and the heart, are at war, the reverse happens-- we feel unwell, we feel unhappy, stressed, tired and depleted. We feel exhausted-- the reason for this fatigue is that this inner war within the mind consumes a lot of energy. We constantly struggle with our thoughts and feelings. Sometimes the head has the upper hand, at other times the heart does. We feel pulled in all sorts of different directions (in extreme cases, it can feel like inner torture; one aspect of our mind literally tortures the other by refusing to accept or acknowledge it).

As a result of this inner conflict, all aspects of our lives are negatively impacted. The body and mind both suffer. We are unable to focus deeply, we do not sleep well, we feel anxious and panicky, our body produces stress hormones which wreak havoc on the various organs. These stress hormones can produce all sorts of unpleasant physical symptoms. All in all, life ceases to be enjoyable. It becomes a constant struggle, very unpleasant indeed.

So, as this inner war within the mind is so damaging to our lives, let us examine why this happens. What actually leads to this inner conflict? Why do we turn upon ourselves? Why do we reach a stage where we are at war with our own selves (as this seems so counterintuitive, so counterproductive)?

Well, to be able to understand this, we need to examine the nature and role of the head and the heart in our lives.

 What is the head or the intellect's role? It is meant to help us understand ourselves and the world around us. It enables us to process information, analyse and weigh this carefully and make decisions. These decisions are meant to be for our welfare and hopefully that of others too. The intellect likes to see itself as being sensible, logical, rational and analytical, as being calm and composed. It feels safe and happy in this domain, when the mind behaves this way. 

Very importantly, the intellect likes to be able to understand, to comprehend things. It therefore likes to receive information via our five senses that can be understood in accordance with the laws of nature as they are known today (based on modern science). It feels comfortable when things happen in accordance with these comforting and predictable scientific laws. 

When a ball is thrown up into the air, the intellect is pleased when it falls down-- that is what it expects in accordance with the law of gravity. What goes up must come down. The intellect feels greatly alarmed when things do not go in accordance with these natural laws. If a ball is thrown into the air and stays there, the intellect would be very frightened. 'What on Earth is happening?!', it would exclaim. 'Good God, how can this be!', it would say. Why, what, how, wherefore, these are the questions the intellect asks. Most important of all, why? Why this, and why that? 

The head seeks to understand and give us information, so that we feel in control, in charge, safe and protected. There is nothing worse that feeling out-of-control and therefore vulnerable from its perspective. Being vulnerable is dangerous says the head, being in control is safe. "I've got my head in the right place" the intellect says in satisfaction when it feels that things are going well according to its plan.

"I need to know everything, and be in control and in charge of everything in my life, so that I can be safe and feel protected as much as possible"-- this is the mantra of the intellect. 

Now, this is a noble aim indeed. But sadly for the intellect, the universe is not designed entirely according to its wishes. No, the universe has its own ideas. The universe is created by a Higher Intelligence, much higher than the intellect. The intellect cannot grasp or understand this Higher Intellect and is frequently flummoxed by its ways. 

"Why is this happening?" laments the intellect, when it finds that the Higher Intelligence is doing something that does not fit with its expectations of life or with scientific laws. This is a significant issue particularly in spiritual life because the intellect is unfamiliar with the working of the Spirit, of spiritual laws. 

The lower intellect often tries to deny the existence of the Higher Intelligence as it does not like to feel there is anything higher than itself (this is a manifestation of the lower ego, a major obstacle in spiritual life). It therefore rejects the feelings of the heart that says that God exists, that everything will be ok if one accepts the will of God in life.

Even when the intellect accepts the existence of God, it finds it difficult to hand over control, hand over charge to this Higher Intelligence --because handing over charge feels scary, there is a lack of trust. The intellect likes to trust only itself (and not God, let alone anyone else), but unfortunately, it is usually not at all as clever as it would like to be. It therefore frequently finds itself in deep water in life when it gets cut off from God and is unable to find the solutions it desires. This leads to feelings of discontentment and general frustration in life.

Let us now examine the heart representing our emotions, feelings and intuition. Before we go deeper into this subject, let us take a moment to reflect that in society, the emotional mind is usually despised, mocked and looked down upon. "He/she is so emotional!" people may say in a derogatory fashion. "Don't be so emotional!" we are told by our loved ones at times. "Don't display your emotions, keep them in check (to avoid looking ridiculous)!" is the message that is ingrained in many of us from childhood. 

And as for 'intuition', many people see this as an airy-fairy, made-up nonsense and are very suspicious of it; they do not even believe it exists, let alone trust in it (I have to admit I was this way for most of my life, and it is only because of some events that happened in recent years, that I have been compelled to accept that intuition is very real and that one can experience something higher than the intellect).

This unhealthy attitude towards one's emotions and feelings is rife (to varying extents) in societies all over the world and affects both men and women. In many countries, unfortunately this is especially targeted at boys and men.  Men in particular are often compelled to suppress and hide their emotions and pretend these barely exist due to peer pressure (known these days by the term 'toxic masculinity'). They are told that they need to 'act tough' and 'be manly' all the time and that suppressing their feelings is a necessary part of this. As a result, sadly, they are especially at risk of the inner war that I mentioned earlier, the war between the head and the heart. They often find it harder to recognise and accept their feelings as they judge themselves so harshly and society can judge them too. 

Fortunately, with increasing awareness of mental health, and the need to tackle anxiety, depression and so on (which are all hugely on the increase worldwide, especially in the current times of strife), there is much more discussion about the need to acknowledge and accept one's feelings. This is still hard for many men and women to do, especially when the feelings are uncomfortable and inconvenient (will come back to this again a bit later).

So, coming back to the heart-- what is it exactly? The heart represents all of our emotions, both higher and lower. The higher emotions include love, compassion, kindness, respect, empathy, selflessness, concern for the welfare of others and a wish to serve others. The general theme of our higher emotions is that they are based on higher values such as compassion, truthfulness and self-control (these are the yogic ethics 'ahimsa', 'satya' and 'brahmacharya'). We can call this the spiritual heart, the higher aspect of the human mind. 

When we experience these higher emotions regularly, when we invite and strengthen them within us, we grow closer to our divine nature, we express this more truly. The more we act in accordance with our higher emotions, the more divine our life becomes. Not only this, we form a closer link with the God within us. Now God includes both Higher Intelligence and Divine love, so the higher emotions become a gateway to access this divine aspect of our nature. 

We thus develop our intuition, which is that aspect of our being which acquires information directly from the Higher Intelligence without the assistance of the five senses, thus transcending the intellect. The intution rests upon our cultivation of higher emotions, upon the spiritual heart. It stands above the human intellect in its capacity to know the truth as it is connected to God Him/Herself.

In contrast to higher emotions, our lower emotions act as a block between our mind and God. Feelings of selfishness, fear, anger, cruelty, disrespect, contempt, ill-wishing, superiority, jealousy, hatred and so on are completely the opposite of our true divine nature. These lead us downward. When we encourage these sorts of feelings, we cut ourselves off from all Divine support. 

We then find ourselves in a difficult position in this world. Without a connection with the Divine, the lower mind/emotions finds itself relying entirely on the intellect. The intellect is also tarnished by the lower emotions. It becomes cloudy and unclear. It makes poor decisions and poor judgements. It finds it hard to see things clearly in the midst of the turbulent negative emotions in the mind. As a result, the intellect makes errors in judgement and propels us to act wrongly. And when we act wrongly, we set in motion the wheel of negative karma-- we will suffer for this sooner or later. 

Therefore, we see that the head and the heart are both extremely important. They need to both be acknowledged and work in harmony for us to live a happy and productive life on this planet, both spiritually and materially.

In summary, a healthy head or intellect requires a healthy spiritual heart or cultivation of higher divine emotions. This includes truthfulness and compassion in particular. When the heart is healthy, the emotions are clean and non-turbulent, and the intellect can see things clearly. Intuition also develops due to the closer bond with our divine aspect. Then we find ourselves able to understand ourselves and the world better and make good decisions. We feel happy and peaceful. When we seek the will of God, of the Higher Intelligence/Divine love, we find ourselves making the best decisions of all. Because the wisdom of God far exceeds that of our human heads.

"I need to cultivate higher emotions, live an ethical life based on truth and compassion, and seek the will of God in my life as this makes me feel safe and protected"-- this is the mantra of the healthy spiritual heart (higher emotions and intuition).

"I need to look after myself and my feelings at all costs and do not care what happens in the process to other people and their feelings"-- this is the mantra of the unhealthy heart (lower emotions).

I want to say something additional about truthfulness here. The view of the yogis is that this is the single most important virtue that needs to be practiced in the current spirtual age (or 'yuga'). This virtue alone, they say, will lead to all other virtues including selflessness, non-violence and self-control. When we know we have to be truthful, we will want to act in such a way that we have nothing to hide. There is nothing worse than living a life of denial of the truth. 

The practice of truth is therefore of paramount importance in developing the higher emotions. It is necessary for the development of devotion, of concentration upon God and for spiritual progress. Without truth, there can be no spiritual progress whatsoever. This includes recognising our own truth, namely, seeing our thoughts and feelings as they really are, and these may not always be convenient to us.

There can be times when it is not easy to accept the truth. This is one significant reason why the head and heart go to war. The heart experiences something-- it may be related to the spiritual or the material world-- but the head is unwilling to accept this experience. The head tells the heart that this should not be, it cannot be, it must not be. The heart however cannot stop feeling what it does. It is its nature to feel after all. Telling it not to feel is like telling water not to flow or telling fire not to burn. It is made to be this way. 

Therefore, regardless of whether or not we feel comfortable sharing our feelings with others, we need to, at the very least, be comfortable accepting our feelings as they are. This is part of what is called 'emotional intelligence' (this is the intelligence of the heart, which is as important as that of the head). There is no right or wrong when it comes to feelings (positive ones I mean). How we act on our various feelings in life is another matter altogether and that requires us to consider our circumstances and that of others and seek the will of God. 

And when we feel that we are heading towards, or are already in the midst of, an inner war, it is wise to seek the guidance of God to help resolve the situation. The help of God will ultimately be good for both the head and the heart. This is another place where the mantra can be very useful. 

The mantra, which is God in sound form, is described by the yogis as something that brings peace to our lives, it balances all aspects of the mind, gives us the inner strength to live our lives according to the higher values of truthfulness and so on. Recitation of a mantra of God will over time lead to harmony developing between the head and heart, and between our inner and outer lives. We must be true to ourselves if we are to progress on the spiritual path. We need to ask God to enable us to live a life based on truth, based on dharma/righteousness if we are to experience our true nature.

Om Satyaya Namah 

Om prostrations to God as Truth

Om Namo Narayanaya.

Hari Aum Tat Sat