Monday 18 September 2017

Tuning the sitar string just right

Hari Aum.

I will write about the importance of balance in spiritual life today. I will share my views on how to continue long-term spiritual practices based on my own experience of what works and the obstacles.

We all know that sadhana is only successful if one is willing to work for a long time. The light of our sadhana needs to be steady and regular like the sun which rises every day. It should not be like a comet, which flashes dramatically in the sky for a short time and then disappears.

But how to sustain sadhana for years and years like the great yogis so that we can experience the benefits?

The secret lies in balance. Sadhana must be intense but yet it should be enjoyable. Now this may sound like a paradox. When we say intense sadhana, we usually mean that this should involve some suffering. Like standing on one leg for years, or fasting for months or some other self-torture. Yes some suffering and penance is inevitable in spiritual life. But one's sadhana must never feel like a type of self-torture or one will not be able to do it for long.

One needs to feel one's sadhana is enjoyable, one must slowly develop a love for it- so much so, that one desperately wants to ensure it happens every day. This way, no matter what the life circumstances are, one will ensure that one can do sadhana regularly.

So how to do sadhana daily without it feeling like a punishment, a torture? The key is balance, a sattvic approach.

One must take great care in building up a daily practice. The rajas and tamas elements in the mind will always try to mislead one.

Let me give an example relating to the obstructive forces of rajas and tamas when it comes to building a daily practice.

About 14 years ago, I was in my first year at medical school and the first term was over. An end-of-term examination was coming up and six weeks were given beforehand to prepare for this. There was a lot of material to learn and I was determined to do well in the exam. I therefore made a very tough timetable and studied hard for long hours every day without allowing any proper breaks.

As a result, after about four weeks of working like this my mind felt burnt out. I felt I just could not face looking at a medical textbook. Due to this burn-out, the final two weeks of the holidays were wasted as my mind felt unable to study. Fortunately the exam still went okay, but I learnt a serious lesson from this experience.
The mind must be handled carefully to get work out of it. One must work hard with proper breaks to give the mind time to recover so it will work efficiently. Needless to say, for the rest of my medical school examinations, I ensured a careful balance between work and rest and performed well.

I have applied this same rule to my spiritual life. The same rajasic part of my mind, which made me overwork and burn out on that occasion in medical school, tries to make me burn out in spiritual life. This side of the mind says "Do more, do more"- basically do an unsustainable amount of daily sadhana.

We all have this rajasic component in our minds. This side of our mind promises everything and does nothing. It tells us the sadhana we are doing is a mere nothing, one must do huge amounts that are unsustainable to succeed. The moment one tries to do this, the rajasic mind turns tamasic.
Like a chameleon, it rapidly changes colour and says "Oh I am too tired, this sadhana is too tough, I cannot do it, it is torture, I want to give up and stop".

This way the mind tricks one in to committing to a huge amount of sadhana which it promises it will do, and later it rebels and stops everything.

Stopping sadhana is a very unfortunate situation which must be avoided for success in spiritual life. So how to handle the danger of this rajasic-tamasic mind?

The answer is the sattvic approach. The middle way. The path of balance. One has to tell the mind- "Look here, I want to do sadhana every day for years, understand? So I will work every day, and I will rest and recover everyday. I will neither overwork, nor underwork. I will take the balanced approach, the middle way. This way I can continue sadhana for a long time".

Yogis give the example of tuning the sitar. If the sitar string is made too tight, it will break and you cannot play music (this represents rajas- overdoing it and breaking in the process).  If the sitar string is too loose and slack, again you cannot play (this represents tamas- not doing enough).

If the sitar string is tuned just right, you can play beautiful music (this represents sattva, the balanced approach). Similarly the mind must be tuned just right to get proper sadhana out of it. It must be handled carefully like musical instrument.

One must take on only that much sadhana which feels comfortable and enjoyable to do. If one enjoys the sadhana, one will do it daily. If it feels like a terrible pain, a tremendous strain, our mind will give it up at the earliest opportunity. And then we will be nowhere.

As my third puraschanara comes to a close (will be completed in about three weeks), the rajasic component of my mind has been inciting me to increase the number of malas dramatically.

Over the past six years, I carefully built up a routine of doing on average 11 malas a day. (Before I started my purascharana practice, in 2011, I was doing just 1 mala twice a day- so 11 malas a day was a big step for me.) It took me some years to become comfortable doing 11 malas every day without a break.
In the past few months, after very careful consideration, I increased this to 15 malas a day. This was because 11 malas felt relatively easy-  and although 15 malas daily requires some effort, it is still not a huge strain- I should be able to manage this every day if I am disciplined.
I intend to do the fourth purascharana at 15 malas a day so this will take 1.5 years instead of 2 years to complete (and therefore gives me more time overall for future sadhana).

However my old friend, the rajasic mind, regularly tries to sabotage my sadhana efforts. It says "Come on, what is all this nonsense of just 15 malas a day? What kind of tapas is this? Why don't you do 21 malas daily, then you would finish a purascharana in a year! Why not do 24 malas a day, then you would complete it in just 10 months. That would be great!"

I know that my current situation will not permit  me to do 21-24 malas daily- this is due to my work as a doctor and other home-related responsibilities. I am a japa yogi but I combine japa with karma yoga (my work/home responsibilies). Furthermore, my Guru Sivanada, advised a balanced approach- japa, karma, jnana, hatha yoga (not just japa yoga).

Therefore the balanced aspect of my mind says- "Wait, wait. Go slow and steady. Don't jump too fast and break your legs. Don't burn out. You find 15 malas a day comfortable although this is still an effort- stick with this for now. Do not increase or decrease the number of malas for the present". I trust this balanced side of my mind, I feel this is the sattvic side that provides the recipe for continued regular steady sadhana. This balanced approach has always helped me in the past, both in spiritual and material life.

I therefore ignore the rajasic side of my mind which promises me it will do huge amounts of sadhana daily, and later rebels and turns tamasic, refusing to do anything at all. I have seen this rajas-tamas play of my mind plenty of times before and refuse to fall for its tricks this time. However it is not at all easy to always recognise the tricks of one's mind and this is where prayer to God to ask for His/Her grace becomes very necessary.

I pray to God to keep me on the spiritual path, no matter what happens in daily life and no matter what tricks my mind tries to play. I feel it is only because of the grace of God that I have been able to stay on this spiritual path so far.

Now it is coming up to Navaratri time and I have taken a week off from work to recharge spiritually. I plan to enjoy this week by doing kirtan, reading some spiritual books, visiting  a temple or two and just be happy. I want to express my thanks to the Divine Mother for helping me get this far in my sadhana and to request Her help to continue until I attain God.

Aside from reciting the navarna mantra during this time, I will chant the saptasloki Durga and other hymns to the Goddess - basically I will just do what comes spontaneously from the heart (I am disciplined with my daily mantra japa so I allow my mind to be spontaneous when it comes to other sadhanas including this).

Happy navaratri to all. I wish you all the best of luck in tuning the sitars of your minds, to enable regular daily sadhana and attainment of spiritual wisdom and bliss.

Hari Aum Tat Sat



P.S. I am writing a little conversation here between the sattva, rajas and tamas components of the mind. This is intended as a caricature to highlight the absurd conflicting thoughts that can arise in our mind when it comes to starting and doing sadhana.  You may or may not experience something similar at times.

Let's say a hypothetical sadhaka thinks "Hmmmm, let me start doing 5 malas of japa daily. This is a good start as unfortunately I have not been doing any sadhana at all for a while and I want to attain God in this lifetime".

Immediately the rajasic mind wakes up and says "What! A mere 5 malas a day! Don't make me laugh! You will get nowhere with just 5 malas a day. You must do at least 50-60 malas a day- that's more in line what all the past great yogis did. Don't doubt yourself, you are fully capable of this, O hero!"

Then the sadhaka thinks "Well, maybe I would be doing too little going from 0 malas to just 5. Maybe I should do 50 malas daily. As they say, no pain, no gain."

The sadhaka then does 50 malas a day but this takes around 4-6 hours daily, and there is not much time for anything else. If s/he is living in a cave with no other people, this is fine. But if s/he is living in an Ashram or a house with other people, there will be some work expected from the sadhaka. The sadhaka struggles with finding time for Ashram/home/office responsibilities as well as japa. S/he gets exhausted after 2-3 weeks of doing 50 malas a day. Sleep has been reduced because the malas are done late into the night (cannot finish all malas in the daytime due to work in the Ashram/home/office). The sadhaka feels tired and exhausted and unable to concentrate properly on the mantra- the sadhana is not enjoyable and feels like torture.

At this point, when the sadhaka is feeling tired and sad, the tamasic mind attacks him/her. "What are you doing? There is no time right now for this kind of sadhana. It is better you stop this  nonsense now. Your seva/service in the home/office/Ashram is quite enough to worship God. No need to take the name of the Lord for hours like this. Utterly ridiculous! Where do you get such foolish ideas?"

The exhausted sadhaka then gives up the sadhana with relief and some sadness. The rajasic mind now berates him/her severely for stopping the sadhana- "What a complete failure you are! Such a little sadhana you could not do. Look what great sadhana the great yogis can do, and look at you. Where is the comparison! No point worrying about yoga and attaining God. Just live your life as a normal person- you are not fit for any tapas".
Note how the same mind which said the sadhaka was a great hero who could do great tapas, now criticises him/her severely and makes him/her feel like a complete zero. The poor sadhaka shrinks away feeling like a failure and and sadly contemplates giving up the search for God altogether.

At this point the sattvic mind intervenes and says "Friend, don't lose heart. You did not listen to me earlier because the rajasic mind sounded more impressive, but listen to me now. Just start doing a little bit of sadhana daily, something you can manage comfortably. Little by little, as you gradually grow stronger with time, you can increase the sadhana steadily. You are not a failure, neither are you a hero. You need to set some simple achievable goals for sadhana and do it while taking care of your life as a whole. Just start with the 5 malas a day you were thinking about- you will be able to do this easily and this will be a definite improvement on your current 0 malas a day! The name of the Lord is all-powerful and auspicious. Every little bit of japa counts towards your spiritual progress. Come on, let's get started!"

The sadhaka feels renewed hope, and this time resolutely ignoring both rajasic and tamasic components of the mind, says "Yes, I can do a little every day!". In time the sadhaka begins to enjoy the sadhana and continues this steadily for a long while, thus reaping the rich reward of spiritual progress.

Let us therefore listen to the balanced sattvic side of our minds, and try to ignore as much as possible the unrealistic rajasic side and the lazy tamasic side. May God and Guru bless us all in our efforts.

Hari Aum Tat Sat

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